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Day 28 Homeschool Mom Burnout And New Homeschooler Free Bootcamp

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This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

Today, Day 28 is homeschool mom burnout tips and sanity savers. You’ll love the other tips on my 31 Day Free Boot Camp for New Homeschoolers.

When I started homeschooling, I printed out EVERYTHING and I do mean EVERYTHING that I had found on a topic that we were going to study.

I put it all into huge 3 ring white binders.

Oh, it was organized, but like I have said before my organization skills had nothing to do with knowing how to teach.

Before I knew it, my shelves were overflowing with “unit studies”.

Well that is what I thought anyway. In reality, not the world I was living in at the time, my shelves were full of torturing tools for my toddlers.

Day 28 Homeschool Mom Burnout And New Homeschooler Free Bootcamp

Over scheduling and over planning are the telltale signs of not just the inexperienced, but of those that do not know how to say no.

We are going to practice how to say no in a minute, but right now, I want to share some questions with you that can be used to evaluate your planning and scheduling when burnout is brewing.

Questions for Homeschool Mom Burnout

Mark this and come back to them anytime you feel tension in your routine.

Have I been home or am I on the road too much?

Have I forgotten how to say no?

Have I taken time to pray, and get spiritual nourishment?

Have I taken time to share my concerns with my husband?

Do I need to switch curriculum or switch out my children with somebody else? Okay okay. Or is it that I don’t need to have my children do ALL of what a curriculum is telling me to do?

Do I need to obtain curriculum that is more structured so I am more accountable?

Do I need to incorporate more fun and relaxing times in my day?

Have I forgotten that curriculum is not magical, accredited or teaches character? I am teaching a child not a curriculum. So a relationship, capturing their heart and a (serving heart) attitude toward my children makes me view them correctly and that is as “individuals or persons”.

Have I forgotten that a child is entitled to a childhood with free time to explore, investigate and have a separate opinion from mine?

I have already shared with you how to realistically plan for your day on Day 8: Organize Your Home – Then School and a simple how to on lesson planning Day 20: Lesson Plan or Lesson Journal.

But I have not explained the secret to maintaining moderation and balance.

It is a simple exercise I do with my newbies in my workshop.

And that is to put your lips together and say NO! Let’s try it now—-say it out loud: NOOOOOOO!!! There, you said it.

I know you may be just the perfect person for heading up the potluck dinner for your friends.

Or, maybe you’re hosting a baby shower, or leading that volunteer group this year, but PLEASE hear my heart when I say: Give Yourself THIS year to learn how to homeschool and do not over commit. 

Think: Are not my children worth the things that I let go this year?

Place a high value on your children’s education and for being there not just in body when they have a question, but with a refreshed mind.

Learn the homeschool ropes and don’t make it extra stressful on yourself by trying to be supermom.

We all try on the supermom cape at various times in our journey and then put it away back in the closet. Some of us try  to wear it constantly and wear ourselves out.

Change your homeschool mood by turning over scheduling, over planning and over load into overjoyed.

New to Homeschooling Start with the Basics

1 – 7 Start with the Homeschool Basics

8-14 Homeschool Organization 101 for Beginners

15 – 21 Best tips for New Homeschoolers Choosing Curriculum

22- 28 Homeschool Preschoolers, Highschoolers, Resistant Learners, Homeschool Mom Burnout

Day 28 Homeschool Mom Burnout And New Homeschooler Free Bootcamp
Day: 28 Over Scheduling + Over Planning = Over load. {31 Day Boot Camp For New Homeschoolers on My Blog}

When Homeschooling is Sucking the Life Out of You

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This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

I must be doing this wrong because homeschooling is sucking the life out of me. I hear it a lot and I felt like that at one time too.

Too, a lot of families who bring kids from public school can find it harder to appreciate the homeschooling lifestyle; many families who have homeschooled from the beginning equally can struggle.

Add in the mix of kids’ lackadaisical attitude toward anything, let alone school work and you have a recipe for quitting.

When Homeschooling Is Sucking the Life Out of You

You may even feel public school is better for your kids.

When Homeschooling Sucks the Life Out of You

Although I don’t claim to have all the answers, from my over 20+ years of homeschooling from prek to high school AND conducting workshops with new homeschoolers, I do have tips that will help you.

Besides, I care. I mean I TRULY care about your success.

I KNOW the homeschooling lifestyle is a superior approach to education. I will tell you why in a minute.

Am I Selfish For Wanting to Send Them to Public School

Homeschooling being superior may not be a popular mindset among public school advocates, but I’m not here to win a popularity contest; I want to see you succeed without you feeling like you have to give life and limb for a lifestyle which is backed by numbers.

I’m here to tell you that you CAN succeed without tons of anxiety and stress and how it can be done.

First, it starts with knowing stats.

Don’t get me wrong, I love math and science, but it’s not the way I normally help people. However, we need to start with an analytical view before I speak from my heart.

When Emotions Are High Judgment Is Low

See when our emotions close in on us and doubt hits our day whether we’re doing enough or not, numbers like how much time we spend teaching our child doesn’t change.

What I’m saying is that one-to-one tutoring is a superior approach to thirty kids to one teacher. It’s simply a matter of odds and time.

Even at times when I felt I was at my breaking point like when my husband almost died, and my sister too, my kids learned way more at that time about what was really important.

Additionally because we did get behind when life hit hard, I was able to catch up far quicker than public school. We did NOT have to wait for a full school year or until other kids got the concepts.

My focus was simply my kids and my family. Although I didn’t feel like I was in control of my life and homeschool and sometimes I wasn’t, I know now that I definitely was.

Unless you’ve checked completely out, meaning you’re not doing one thing to teach your child like having meaningful conversations with him, reading to him, or playing with him, the odds are STILL in your favor of succeeding.

Also, get some more research and stats from this site National Home Education Research Institute to see how homeschoolers really are succeeding.

How to Go From a Crippled to Confident Mindset

I was making the best decisions based on the odds and time actually spent.

Whenever I feel that deep down nagging tug that I’m not doing enough, I remind myself of how much time it actually takes to homeschool.

We have time for many interruptions at home and still have time to make progress.

So I changed my mindset from a choice of sending my kids to public school as my default solution to one of using my time to make homeschool work to the best I could. Instead of putting energy into an approach where my kids odds of learning were actually lowered, I made the homeschooling lifestyle priority.

Next, before I jump into sharing multiple tried and true tips to cope when homeschooling sucks, I want you to know that I don’t believe one should homeschool at all cost.

That belief too is not exactly a popular one with some of the faith-based community.

With all of my heart I know that homeschooling is a superior approach because a child gets a uniquely individualized education; however, there are other factors like health, mental health, and even finances which deter some families.

Homeschooling your children is a very personal decision and one that a family should make for their children without guilt or judgment.

We really do not know what goes on inside of every family’s home and so I respect the decision each family has to make.

10 Tried and True Trips When Homeschooling Sucks

Next, look at these ten tips to cope when homeschooling is sucking the life out of you.

Tip. 1. Just STOP, STEP AWAY, and RESET.

First, we may think we have to keep pushing. Why do we do that to ourselves and our kids?

When in fact, from a complete stop comes rejuvenation, power, and refocus. Sometimes we can try to squeeze homeschooling into a busy life. We may need to stop and look at our schedule again to see what is really important to keep and what can we let go.

Tip 2. Deschool.

A lot is said about deschooling in the homeschool world. Some of it I agree with, other information not so much.

Deschooling is not just something you do when you’re a new homeschooler. It’s a technique for burn out too.

Look at some of these ways to use the deschooling process:

  • Do you need rest? STOP. Take care of your needs and your children’s physical needs. There is nothing selfish about self-care. A break does not mean a stop. It just means a break.
  • Did you jump from public school to homeschool without really taking the time to know how your children learn? Putting your child in the next grade because public school said they belong in a grade is a huge newbie mistake. It take times to know how your children learn and you can do that with inexpensive to free curriculum until you know your child’s learning personality.
  • Deschooling does not always mean idleness. Deschooling is different for each family. I know kids who do well with routine. However, can you scale back your expectations until whatever is the object of the stress subsides? Have you heard of the power of little done often? It’s true.

Furthermore, I share tips here on my video How to Deschool – Are You Doomed If You’ve Never Deschooled.

Tip 3. Do a Unit Study.

Additionally, I switched from boxed curriculum to unit studies many years ago.

Little did I recognize then the full and positive impact they would have on our day and now our journey.

Unit studies can take a bit more time to plan; the return is the satisfaction of learning exactly what interests us.

When homeschooling loses his luster, try a different approach. You may need to just switch approaches instead of quitting homeschooling.

Look at my post Top 5 Approaches New Homeschoolers Need to Know to know you’re following the approach that is best for your family and that you’re not repeating public school at home.

Tip 4. Use Nap Time to Tidy Up.

Moreover, if you have a younger household and still have naptime, use about 15 or 20 minutes of the time for a quick tidy up.

Even though it may not be the type of cleaning you really need, don’t forget the power of little. Every bit counts when you have a house full of littles.

I used to run myself almost completely ragged while two of my kids napped.

Twenty years later, I realized some of the time should have been spent relaxing and just sitting down to put my feet up.

Tip 5. Occupy the Older Kids with their Devices During Naptime.

Likewise, something else I shouldn’t have felt guilt about was allowing my older kids to be entertained while my young children slept.

Thinking I had to constantly school my kids when I was at the point of exhaustion was not balanced.

Homeschooling at all costs, even costing your health is not healthy.

It’s okay to allow kids time to entertain themselves while you rest.

Tip 6. Read.

In addition to using naptime to rest, reading has been one of my best ways to relax.

I read an article that stated: “researchers found that reading is one of the best ways to relax, and even six minutes can be enough to reduce the stress levels by more than two-thirds.“

Too, what I’ve learned now is that even if all we did was reading for the day it was enough.

My kid’s fondest childhood memories are of us reading together as a family.

Reading IS school; all the elements needed for learning like concentration, comprehending, and studying are associated with reading.

Also, reading aloud to your kids has many key benefits, but remember taking time to read what you enjoy rejuvenates YOUR love of learning. That is equally important.

I know you’ll love my book, Homeschooling 31 Day Boot Camp for New Homeschoolers: When You Don’t Know Where to Begin.

5 BEST How to Homeschool Books

I've rounded up some of the best books to help you get started homeschooling.

Homeschooling for New Homeschoolers: When You Don't Know Where to Begin

Homeschooling 31 Day Boot Camp for New Homeschoolers is a real eye-opener on homeschooling. It will alleviate a lot of the anxieties about getting started homeschooling. Reading each chapter’s highlights will give you encouragement, knowledge, guidance, and peace of mind to homeschool with confidence. The best part is that you’ll be educating the person who loves your kids the most in this world--YOU! Armed with the knowledge to make better choices in curriculum will empower you to continue the path of home education. Unlike many books based on one family’s experience, Homeschooling 31 Day Boot Camp for New Homeschoolers is also based on Tina’s many years of mentoring hundreds and hundreds of new homeschoolers at live workshops. When you don’t know where to begin Homeschooling 31 Day Boot Camp for New Homeschoolers equips you to successfully homeschool your children.

The Unhurried Homeschooler

Homeschooling is a wonderful, worthwhile pursuit, but many homeschool parents struggle with feelings of burnout and frustration. If you have ever felt this way, you’re not alone! Most of us need to be reminded of the “why” of homeschooling from time to time—but "The Unhurried homeschooler" takes parents a step further and lifts the unnecessary burdens that many parents place on themselves.

Teaching from Rest: A Homeschooler's Guide to Unshakable Peace

Those who have made the decision to homeschool their children have done so out of great love for their children and a desire to provide them an excellent education in the context of a warm, enriching home.

The Brave Learner: Finding Everyday Magic in Homeschool, Learning, and Life

Parents who are deeply invested in their children's education can be hard on themselves and their kids. When exhausted parents are living the day-to-day grind, it can seem impossible to muster enough energy to make learning fun or interesting. How do parents nurture a love of learning amid childhood chaos, parental self-doubt, the flu, and state academic standards?

Unschooled: Raising Curious, Well-Educated Children Outside the Conventional Classroom

Education has become synonymous with schooling, but it doesn’t have to be. As schooling becomes increasingly standardized and test driven, occupying more of childhood than ever before, parents and educators are questioning the role of schooling in society. Many are now exploring and creating alternatives.

Tip 7. Do a 4-Day Schedule.

Next, one year I switched to a 4-day schedule and never looked back. It’s true, at home we can accomplish more in less time.

However, until you try it you don’t really know.

When I switched to a 4-day schedule, it was one of the BEST things I did early in our journey.

I took off Monday to have a slower start to the beginning of the week. Taking time to get caught up on house cleaning, meal planning, and bill paying gave me a sense of control when my kids were very young.

As my kids grew older and could help more with chores, I switched to having off Friday as a day to rest and rejuvenate.

Look at my posts Should You Switch to a 4-Day Homeschool Schedule and The Sticking Power of a Solid Homeschool Schedule.

Tip 8. Take Time to Educate the Educator.

Another tip I learned was that some of my part in the feeling of lackluster towards homeschool was I didn’t take time to educate myself.

Why do we not think twice about dropping hundreds of dollars on our kids’ education, but don’t take time to learn how to choose curriculum or how to get organized?

Educating children is rewarding and at the same time it’s one of the most draining jobs I’ve ever done.

I needed the essentials in how to homeschool to smooth my path as I educate my children.

Many years, I ago I taught workshops to new homeschoolers and wrote a curriculum.

Having taught that workshop for 10 years, I now put those workshops online for you.

You’ll love my self-paced online workshops.

How-To Homeschool Courses

Go from Overwhelmed to Got this! The detailed courses: Teaching the Stages of Homeschool, How to Choose Curriculum for Beginners, Homeschool Organization for Beginners, and The New Homeschooler Boot Camp are real eye-openers. You already know homeschooling will give your child the most benefit. Now, take time to educate the person who loves your kids the most – YOU!

Tip 9. Find the Balance Between Rigid and Too Relaxed.

Furthermore, it seems when I’m not feeling the love of how easy homeschooling is supposed to be, I’ve had to look at my expectations.

Many homeschoolers are too rigid, but I’ve also seen more homeschoolers who don’t have a plan for the day.

Find out what your children need.

It’s not always a problem of being too rigid, but it could be you don’t have a list of expectations or a routine for the day.

Your children may need more routine instead doing school by knee-jerk reactions. Ouch. It’s hard to self-analyze – always.

Or, are you so rigid that your children feel crushed under the weight of unnecessary sternness?

Again, you are the only one to make this analysis. Achieving homeschool balance is possible if you’re willing to be flexible.

Tip 10. You are doing more than homeschooling AND your children need to know that too.

Finally, you’re doing more than homeschooling your children; you’re training them far beyond academics.

It’s flat out hard to parent while being a homeschool educator.

They’re intertwined. And you do not want to keep your two roles separate.

Because parenting and homeschooling are weaved together, your kids have responsibilities beyond their academics for the day.

Hear my heart when I say it’s hard to STOP and take time to train your kids to clean, cook, do chores and put away their toys or objects.

However, not only are you teaching them to be independent, you’re instilling pride and confidence.

Many kids who are grown lack self-confidence. Although doing chores is not a complete problem solver, it is a solution.

Chores give kids a sense of pride, belonging, and a way to help others.

Many years I had to accept a kid friendly cleaned house; it wasn’t always easy because I had high expectations.

However, I’m FOREVER grateful that instilled an ethic of hard work in each of my sons.

Is Homeschooling Really Freeing

Now that they have roommates, their roommates thank me for my sons’ positive mindsets and neat and clean habits.

Encourage your child to be a good friend when he is an adult.

It does start with his surroundings, taking care of his room, and other areas in the house.

I love when I get positive feedback from my son’s roommates and moreover I hope in the future, their spouses will too.

Respect comes first from caring for themselves and their area in your home; it pours over then into a child’s live when they’re away from you and now adults.

They extend that same courtesy to others and learn how to truly be happy.

What I’m saying is sometimes homeschooling is a heart problem and not a homeschooling problem.

What genuinely makes kids happy is being fulfilled each day no matter how small the task.

Do not forget that the odds are in your favor for succeeding.

Go slow and remember your kids deserve to know how to take care of themselves, clean, cook, know how to follow a schedule, and take care of others.

Kids will NEVER forget how you SKILLFULLY prepared them for life not just academics.

When Homeschooling Is Sucking the Life Out of You

Don’t forget to think about what brought you to homeschooling in the first place and look up from the pit of despair.

Most circumstances are temporary at best although we don’t feel that way at the moment.

Having an online homeschool group is important too. You need to know you’re not alone. You’ll love my facebook group if you do facebook.

With Power Struggles Give Choices and Freedom

With plenty of rest or even stopping for a bit until you rekindle your love of homeschooling, I hope this heart to heart talk nudges you in the right decision for you family.

From my heart to yours, homeschooling has been worth every bit of stress and tears.

If you’re struggling right now, please let me hear from you. I may not have a solution, but I may be able to steer you in the right direction.

Look at these other tips:

Hugs and love ya,

How To Juggle Homeschool When You’re Coping With More Than A Mom Should

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This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

I was going to create a long video on how to juggle homeschool when you’re coping with more than a mom should, but I didn’t. In my short facebook live video on my group, I do talk about it a little.

Although I’m not a weepy person, the truth of it is if I created a longer video, I couldn’t get through it without weeping and airing my raw emotions.

Why Juggle Homeschool During Extreme Stress

That’s not a negative for me; I want you to know what is working and not working for me. It’s important to me that you have some tips to ease your load and know that you’re not alone.

Read my words, but feel my raw emotions as I pour them out to you. I hope to encourage and lift you up in my transparency.

Circumstances are different for every mom, but the same raw emotions ebb and flow. You don’t have to feel the exact same pain as another to put yourself in another’s shoes.

What I went through years ago as far as crisis in my life pales into comparison to what I’ve recently been through and am going through. More on that in a minute.

How To Juggle Homeschool When You're Coping With More Than A Mom Should

Life wasn’t finished beating me or my family up. The longer you homeschool which is living life, the more stress can head your way.

When You’re A Control Freak But You Have No Control – None

So why keep homeschooling? More on that in a minute too.

Also, keeping things to your self is not always a good thing. You couldn’t possibly know what a very private person I am, but I am. I love my family and try to be dignified with their feelings and privacy.

It’s important for me to to not overshare. Know that there are things I must keep private; I’m walking a line here.

However, understanding what I’ve been through I hope I can reduce your stress and anxiety; I want you to know that sending your kids off to public school is not always the least stressful thing to do.

Life Can be Like the Cycle on The Dryer. Tumble, tumble, tumble. (Beat you up). Wait. Catch Your Breath. Hold on. REPEAT.

It was enough then and is enough now, but I have no choice as more is heaped on me.

First, look at what was heaped on me then.

One year my sister who homeschooled her kids got a staph infection.

First Sign of Homeschool Stress – What Will YOU Do

She had to be intubated because she couldn’t breathe and was unconscious for days. I cared for her in the ICU, comforted her kids and the whole family while taking care of my kids and husband.

Driving to get there when I first found out, I wondered if she would make it. Facing fear is not easy. It’s the kind of stress and sickness you feel that brings you to your knees and makes you puke.

Thankfully, she had wonderful doctors, the infection was contained and she was sent to a long-term facility for months.

Driving to see her and support her 40 minutes away from my house 4x a week or more was exhausting. My kids were with me the whole time. I thought that year would never end.

However, I had no clue what the next year held for me.

My husband had a massive heart attack. It was also the year my first son got to high school.

You know high school is scary enough, but it had nothing on what we went through that year. Yes, my husband beat the widow maker.

Vividly, I recall that day years ago. I shared with many of you who still follow me how I agonized over choosing the right words when you think they may be your last to your husband.

I finally made it to my husband’s side at the hospital in time to be with him while the doctors shuffled my husband off to surgery and saved his life. That night which I’ve never shared was one of the loneliest nights I’ve ever been through.

Knowing how close I came to life changing forever, I cried all night alone.

Some Stress Is Unavoidable

Next, the long year to recovery and hubs changing jobs was ahead.

Did I mention too that folks want to give you all kinds of nutritional advice assuming your lifestyle contributed to his heart attack?

I never shared before that he inherited heart disease from both sides of his family and his heart attack although happening while he was young, didn’t happen at 40 years old like his father and great grandmother before him.

Matter of fact, the doctors said it was our lifestyle which saved his life because of how stress free we tried to lead our life.

Life as I knew it went back to some kind of normal. However, my kids and I were forever changed.

Knowing the value of how you never know what the next day holds, we seized the time time together as a family and made a big change in our life.

We sold our huge home with pool and packed what we wanted in two cases for each of us and moved overseas to South America.

It was the BEST decision we ever made. Our years spent together in adventure was just what we need to get over what we couldn’t control.

Is Returning to Public School the Answer

Look at these four things that my kids and I learned from those years of hardship.

  1. We drew closer together as a family. If I had to put my kids in public school, we would have been separated at a time we needed each other. However, I weathered the storm remembering that it is just that. That means it’s temporary.
  2. It taught my kids to seize moments of friendship both in the family and with their friends outside of the family. You don’t know what will change this afternoon.
  3. Although I worried my sons may have grown up too fast, in fact teaching them to stand with me as we face feared helped them to set reasonable standards for themselves during our crisis. Even adults today don’t know when to stop putting pressure on themselves when under enough strain.
  4. Homeschooling is all about modeling how I want to my kids to learn meaningful things. What would I be teaching them if I didn’t set the example on what their focus should be when life hits hard? Everything I believe in about the homeschooling lifestyle came full circle. In life, sometimes we need to be a caregiver. I knew their academics wouldn’t be interrupted too long, but my kids’ education reaches far beyond academics.

Next, you want to take a self-check. Long term stress can cause terrible emotional and physical harm.

There is a difference between BENDING and BREAKING. You never want to get to the point of breaking.

With all of my heart I believe our emotional and mental health while homeschooling is not talked about enough.

There should be NO judgment or feeling like you’re weak or less if you send your kids to public school.

Choosing to Look on the Bright Side – A Choice

At this point, I’ve not had to seek professional help, but have not ruled it out if I need it. Seeking professional help is a sign of strength and not weakness. It means you care about your health and the health of your kids.

Bodies react differently to stress.

I allowed the stress to bend me although many days I feel like breaking. In my heart of hearts I knew what was right for my family.

But that wasn’t all I learned, I also learned:

  • If I sent my kids to public school that there was no way I could have the flexibility to care for my sister and husband on my terms.
  • You’re told to live one day or one moment at a time, but you embrace the true meaning when you experience extreme stress.
  • Control what I really had control of. That means I couldn’t let my mind worry about things that were not on my plate for that day. I saved my energy for what I’m experiencing NOT what I think I MAY experience. I was turning my load to anxiety and had to rein that back in. Do you know how REALLY hard that TRULY IS? There is a line between staying ahead of caring for all what is on your plate versus unnecessary worrying.

How to Power Through Homeschool During a Crisis (The Second Time)

Recalling all of what I just shared with you, I’ve been hit hard AGAIN.

Look at what I’m currently dealing with.

My husband is experiencing more complications with his heart. Each day is a precious day. For now, he is good, but managing his health is on my plate again.

My mother is now at end stage renal disease.

This is weighing heavy on my heart. Not only does she have to go to dialysis 3x a week, but she had a stoke and has continued to decline in health. Did you know seizures follow because of the stroke?

Although we’re managing my mom’s care daily, there is no controlling what you can’t control.

There is just letting my mother know what a treasure she is when she can understand me.

Seeing your mother go from an extremely intelligent, compassionate, and caring woman to almost a child is gut-wrenching daily.

But again, I remember whatever I feel is not anything I know my mother is going through. That keeps me going daily. All my mother knows right now is that I love her deeply and she loves me deeply. There will never be enough words to tell her how precious she is to me, but I try daily.

My mother-in-law now lives in an assisted living and my husband and I manage her care as well. Right now, she’s been exposed to Covid and with the onset of dementia, we constantly remind her daily of what is going on.

Did I mention my dad is now 80 years old and has his own set of health problems which needs to be managed while he helps care for my mom?

Any given day, I’m not sure which one of my family members will need help for the day.

Currently many days are not all my own to plan or juggle homeschool units.

How to Plan When You Can’t Catch A Break

However, I choose to trek forward. Look at five mindsets I’m utilizing now as I manage in STEPS.

  1. Ask: What TRULY is important to me today? That is my ONE goal for the day.
  2. Live today, not worry about tomorrow. This one is really hard for me because I’m a planner. Instead of worrying what may happen to any of the precious people in my life right now, I save my energy and passion for dealing with what is REALLY happening.
  3. Identify the difference between stress and anxiety. I’m still learning new things. Stress is unavoidable because it involves life. Stress turns to anxiety when I worry about things that may never happen. All I have done is add anxiety instead of keeping my mind and body healthy.
  4. Know when to stop homeschooling and when to cut back. I know now that my sons could have never gone to public school because they felt they would have missed what was going on at home. I had to think about their feelings. Knowing when to get help either online, by a tutor, or when to stop for a short time is paramount. Weigh EACH day as it’s happening instead of planning like life is normal until it is again.
  5. Self-care for the caregiver is necessary. (I know, but heart my heart. It’s NECESSARY). Passing out is not a good when you’re the caregiver. When so much is on your shoulders, you have to find time even if it’s a short time to rejuvenate. Many days I am physically EXHAUSTED, but waking up REALLY early when all is quiet has calmed my nerves and allows me to think. I spend the time thinking, meditating, and reading. Sure, I’m physically exhausted a lot of days, but my mental and emotional health needs the recovery. Not every day can I get up that early, but a few days a week it has become necessary. Find time whether really LATE or really EARLY to feed your mental health.

Adopt Compassion Over Compulsion

The biggest lesson I’ve learned is compassion over compulsion. Compassion moves a person to try to spare the suffering of others. Compulsion is what a person does by rote or grudgingly.

Deep in my raw and exposed heart, I know I can’t relieve any of the things going on in my family right now. But by me being there for all of them every day and my words, they know they are not alone as they face challenges every day.

When to Let Others Know And When to Let them In

Lastly, even machines are made with escape valves. I’m no machine, I’m not unusually strong, but I choose to share with others. Writing about this is self-help like one wise homeschool mom told me.

Life is precious and each of these people in my life didn’t ask for this to happen to them, but I manage each day as it comes up.

Yes, I would like to go back to a nothing but homeschooling life and blogging, but it probably won’t be for a while.

Tell me friend, can you relate? Has life thrown at you more than your fair share? Have you lost someone dear to you or have had a terrible setback? I don’t have all the answers, but know I TRULY care.

How To Juggle Homeschool When You're Coping With More Than A Mom Should

Look at these other tips on how to juggle homeschool when life hits hard:

Hugs and love ya,

15 Old-Fashioned Useful Skills Homeschoolers Love To Teach

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This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

Here are 15 old-fashioned useful skills homeschoolers love to teach. Also, look at my page The Dynamics of How to Homeschool Easily and Smarter.

Whether you didn’t learn these skills in school or you’re determined to give your children the best education you’ll love these useful skills to teach.

Besides, teaching only academics and not life skills is a huge flaw in the educational world. We don’t want to repeat that same nonsense thinking.

15 Old-Fashioned Useful Skills Homeschoolers Love To Teach

So we choose to intentionally teach what other educators view as vintage or old-fashioned because we know some obsolete skills prepare today’s kids for adulthood.

Look at these 15 skills, academic or otherwise which homeschoolers still love to teach.

Old-Fashioned Skills for Today’s Kids

1. Cursive writing.

Unless a child has a special need, most homeschooling parents know that learning to write and cursive writing are valuable skills.

Beyond the fact that most early documents were hand-written, cursive writing supports hand-eye coordination and can reduce letter reversals.

Look at some of my tips below about how I teach writing.

2 Finance

3 Accounting

4 Budgeting

5 Money Management

6 Writing a Check

Yes they are all very different skill sets.

Although they are connected learning to budget and run a household is different than money management.

Money management is not only a skill used in personal life but can be applied to a business.

You want your children to have as many as they can get while living with you.

Today’s kids learn early how to use a debit or credit card without knowing what is a budget or knowing ways to rein in their spending.

Subjects Not Taught in Public School

Distinguishing between a need versus a want is an extremely valuable skill to teach kids.

Not teaching a kid about finances while in middle or high school or even earlier may set him up for much debt later in life.

Too, many places of business still use paper checks.

Teaching our kids both how to write out a check and how to make a bank deposit in person are necessary skills for adulting.

Next, look at these books about money and look at Whatever Happened To Penny Candy?: A Fast, Clear, and Fun Explanation of the Economics You Need for Success in Your Career, Business, and Investments.

8 Rad Money Resources to Teach Money For All Ages

Grab some of these money resources to teach your children about how to save and budget money.

Not Your Parents' Money Book: Making, Saving, and Spending Your Own Money

For the first time, financial guru and TODAY Show regular Jean Chatzky brings her expertise to a young audience. Chatzky provides her unique, savvy perspective on money with advice and insight on managing finances, even on a small scale. This book will reach kids before bad spending habits can get out of control. With answers and ideas from real kids, this grounded approach to spending and saving will be a welcome change for kids who are inundated by a consumer driven culture. This book talks about money through the ages, how money is actually made and spent, and the best ways for tweens to earn and save money.

The Toothpaste Millionaire

Sixth-grader Rufus Mayflower is betting that he can make a whole gallon of toothpaste for the same price as one tube from the store.
There’s just one problem, he has to solve real-life mathematical
equations first! With help from his good friend Kate Mackinstrey, can
these two entrepreneurs keep up with the high demand for their popular product? Beloved children’s author Jean Merrill introduces readers to the ins and outs of a budding business, from costs to profits, in this exciting tale about perseverance, ingenuity, and underdogs.

Learning Resources Money Bags Coin Value Game

  • MONEY GAME FOR KIDS: Players collect, count, and exchange money all the way to the finish line
  • MONEY SKILLS: Learn valuable money skills through fun game play
  • PLAY MONEY: Includes game board with spinner, 100 plastic coins, play bills, markers, and dice

Smart Money Smart Kids - Raising the Next Generation to Win with Money

In Smart Money Smart Kids, financial expert and best-selling author Dave Ramsey and his daughter Rachel Cruze equip parents to teach their children how to win with money. Starting with the basics like working, spending, saving, and giving, and moving into more challenging issues like avoiding debt for life, paying cash for college, and battling discontentment, Dave and Rachel present a no-nonsense, common-sense approach for changing your family tree.

I Want More Pizza: Real World Money Skills For High School, College, And Beyond

The perfect gift! Give the gift of financial literacy to your teen - they will thank you for a lifetime. You are not alone; it is often difficult to reach young adults on the topic of money management, but look no further. I Want More Pizza finally has teenagers excited about personal finance and is giving them the confidence that they can succeed. This resource is being used in classrooms around the nation as young adults enjoy the pizza model for learning about money management. Now available for the first time for you to bring into your home, give your young adult the gift of financial literacy and they will thank you for a lifetime. Primary topics discussed include saving, spending, prioritization, goal setting, compound growth, investing, debt, credit cards, student loans, mental blocks, and taking real world action.I am sure you have heard a few of these: "I don't need it", "I'm too young", "I need to spend my money on _____ ", and the list goes on. The pizza model for learning personal finance breaks down those barriers because, well, everyone loves pizza! Just because money management is extremely important doesn't mean that it has to be extremely complex. I Want More Pizza leaves them in complete control to find the plan that works for your young adult - it's their choice. If they don't enjoy math or don't like to plan, no problem, we've got them covered as well. And it's only ~100 pages, which young adults love given their busy social calendars. Money doesn't have to be stressful. Finally reach your young adult and help them become financially literate for a lifetime. After all, there is a lot of pizza in life to enjoy!

Managing Your Money (Usborne Life Skills)

This down-to-earth guide is filled with practical advice on everything from how to budget and be a smart shopper to student loans, mortgages and insurance. An essential book for equipping young people with the skills they need to manage their money now and in the future. Includes links to websites with more tips and advice.

12 Ways for a Homeschooled Teen to Earn Money - A Budding Entrepreneur?

Long before they are of age to start working, kids want their own money. And whether they count bricks at a construction site as a kid like my entrepreneur husband did or just want some spending money, kids are looking for creative ways to earn their own bucks.

Economics for Beginners

Nobody has everything they need, all the time – so how can we make do with what we have? Economics is all about understanding the choices we make to solve this problem. With bright, infographics pictures, this informative book describes why markets are so important, how businesses work out what to sell, and how governments choose how to run a country. Includes Usborne Quicklinks to specially selected websites for more information.

And look at my post 12 Ways for a Homeschooled Teen to Earn Money – A Budding Entrepreneur.

7. How to do taxes.

My kids started working while in high school and although they didn’t make enough to have to prepare a tax return, we still helped them prepare one.

When a child is living on his own he’ll have a basic understanding of tax deadlines and taxes.

He manages adult responsibilities way better than if you had never introduced basic tax how-tos.

8. How to cook from scratch.

The pandemic of 2020 is a perfect example of how life can throw a huge curve.

Because we want our kids self-sufficient, teaching them to cook from scratch like baking basic bread or from what is on hand saves money, teaches independence, and can be healthier.

Look below at a few ways I incorporated this into our learning day:

9. How to fill out a job application and how to do a job interview.

When I helped my first teen fill out a job application, it was hilarious.

School Doesn’t Prepare Us for Life

Although he knew what it was from the exploring career opportunities course in high school, preparing one was quite different.

To this day, he still thanks me and his dad for helping him to look at his set of skills both strengths and weakness realistically.

However, nothing compared to seeing him get ready for his first job interview.

He was pretty comfortable looking to apply for a job that required a dress jacket.

Just a word of advice, be sure your teen knows how employees are expected to dress after you go over your dos and don’ts for a first-time job interview.

10. Learn to read a map.

I love GPS too, but if you’ve ever hiked or walked in a remote area your cell phone is not really a good bet.

Besides learning about scale and distances, a map can teach local geography and can teach us what is around us.

No cell phone service needed.

Things No Longer Taught in School

Maps are engaging and foster a love of learning about places along the way instead of just getting to a point like a gps.

We can use both in our everyday and not let a generation grow up equipped without engaging with a map.

11. Diagramming a sentence.

To understand how words need to be arranged in a sentence to make their thoughts clearer, kids need many ways to learn word arrangement.

When kids have to break down or diagram each part of a sentence it leaves no room for ambiguity. This teaching technique still helps many students.

12. Auto upkeep.

Whether the tires need air or not, when and how to change the oil, and basic upkeep to maintain your safety and the life of a vehicle are important skills to know.

13. Home Economic skills.

I know home economics courses are now called some fancy name like Family And Consumer Sciences.

That is another post for me, but kids need to know how to read recipes, count food portions, food storage, food prep ideas and how to eat healthy.

And while we can teach these skills separately, it’s much easier to teach them while on the job.

Assigning your kids the responsibility to make a grocery list or a meal for the family works.

I started with easy meal ideas for my kids to make for the family and as they grew, so did the cooking skills.

Benefits of Life Skills

In addition, teaching a kid basic sewing can be a lost skill.

Back in the day learning basic sewing skills was a must because all clothes were hand-made. Learning how to sew on a button is still a valuable skill.

14. Latin.

Latin used to be taught at in a lot of public schools.

Today, not all homeschoolers teach Latin, but a lot do.

We see the value of teaching our kids the roots of modern-day language and how to analyze root meanings.

15 Old-Fashioned Useful Skills Homeschoolers Love To Teach

The deductive reasoning used while learning Latin helped my kids to know how to critically think.

15. High School Shop Classes.

Classes like woodworking, metal, and drafting classes seem to be dwindling.

Those types of hand skills are being lost. Electricians, plumbers, and carpenters are valuable skills needed in our community.

Also, these classes were taught in high school so that a teen had time to pursue passions and some of the classes were segues to a higher degree.

These skills are not outdated in our home, but they are skills which propel our kids to the future. A future where our kids are truly prepared for whatever comes their way.

Old Fashioned But Timeless Skills

How can a kid learn about the human body without preparing a meal?

And how can a kid value how fast human history changes unless he can read the thoughts of the founding father in their handwriting  – cursive?

How can a child not be saddled with debt and stress the rest of his life unless we teach him now how to save and when to spend?

Look at some of these other reads:

We don’t have to make a choice between academics or old-fashioned practical skills a child should know. We want them both!

Hugs and love ya,

How to Mesh Your Personality With Homeschooling When They Collide

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This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

Today, I’m sharing how to mesh your personality with homeschooling.

We bring our view of what is education to the homeschool world based on our experiences. That’s not the shocking part. How to mesh our personality with homeschooling when they collide is the painful part.

If you’re like me, you’re a product of public school or maybe you fit in the category of being a public school teacher much like the ones I’ve mentored through the years.

When your idea of schooling is constant testing (without being state mandated), over technical lesson plans, and giving daily grades, it can collide with the relaxed homeschool approach.

How to implement the relaxed and successful approach of homeschooling while maintaining much needed guidance for your structured personality is not easy, but it’s possible.

Having started my journey being severely structured and then learning how to implement a delight-directed approach was a gradual process.

How to Mesh Your Personality with Homeschooling

I didn’t take years to adjust to a relaxed approach when I saw that the delight directed approach worked.

However, the organized part of my personality knew that some guidance was needed so important skills like math and writing did not get left out.

Using strengths to shore up weaknesses in my teaching style was the key for me.

Look at how I started slowly until I lit a fire in my kids for learning.

Tip 1: Start with a content subject.

It takes time to move away from segmented subjects and understand that all bodies of knowledge are connected.

So when going from structured to relaxed, start with history, geography, or science to get your feet wet. Look at Skill Subjects vs. Content Subjects: What’s the Difference.

The content subjects don’t have to be introduced or mastered in an exact order like skill subjects, which are the three Rs – reading, writing, and ‘rithmetic.

For example, if you choose to cover the American Civil War in 4th grade or 7th grade, there will not be any big gaps in your teaching.

You obviously would expect more research, writing, and maybe map work from a middle schooler than an elementary-aged kid, but that is the only difference.

Tip 2: Field Trips, Living Books, and Projects.

The next thing I had to quickly learn was that tools matter. You can’t expect a talented artist to create masterpieces with lame tools.

Kids are the same; learning tools don’t have to be expensive, but kids need relaxed and unstructured time to use them.

Throwing in a field trip as a second thought instead of being the major learning experience does not stir passion or kindle in the slightest a love of learning.

Surrounding your kids with living books, which are books that explain topics in story form, taking regular meaningful field trips and pursuing projects your kids are passionate about stokes the creative juices.

Look at 5 Steps to Choosing Geography Living Books Your Children Will Love and 13 Living History Books about Ancient Greece.

Also grab some tips from 22 Awesome Homeschool History Field Trips.

Tip 3: EVERYONE is passionate about something.

I hear it all the time.

My kid is not interested in anything. He just wants to play games or ride his bike, or ___ (insert anything here other than “school”). Even games can have educational value.

Turn fun into learning. This is the hard part for personalities who want to stay structured, but I have many examples to show you how. Here is one. Look at my post Screen-Free Educational Activities for Kids Who Love Video Games.

If you fill up every bit of time with scheduled activities, a child has no time to linger. He needs time to investigate, explore, and discover.

Lingering can produce laziness, but it can also produce a lively, energetic kid IF you provide opportunities.

Between you and I, it can be easier for a structured personality to do this because you have a natural bent toward wanting to be organized.

Look at the list below to provide opportunities:

  • introduce a totally different subject or course that your family doesn’t know much about like marine biology, interior design, or forensic science. What kid doesn’t want to learn about crime. Don’t focus on grading or completing, just introduce and whet your child’s appetite.
  • trade reading for doing. This is not so easy for structured folks who feel that reading a book completely equates to learning sticking. Reading recipes does not make an elite chef. Trading reading for doing looks like this: Instead of reading books only about being interested in pets or animals, volunteer at an animal shelter. If a child is too young, start an easy pet sitting business. When a child wants to learn about music, he plays a piano or guitar. When a child wants to learn about math, he bakes cookies, plays board games, learns by dominoes, learns by a card game, learns by hopscotch and can still read a book. When a teen wants to learn about law, call a law office and have him volunteer for a day or two a week.

The Difference Between Lazy and Relaxed Homeschooler

Tip 4: Turn your weakness into a strength.

One fear of relaxed homeschoolers is not covering everything. It’s the same fear for home educators who have a more structured approach.

Turn your weakness into a strength by creating organizational systems which align with a more relaxed approach.

Hear my heart when I say to let go of all organization is not the answer. It never worked for me. Find your balance by using what your gifts are for your kids.

From my struggle, I created the wildly popular 7 Step Homeschool Planner. It’s a powerful tool for relaxed organization.

More Transitioning to a Relaxed Homeschool Lifestyle Tips

A few key points to take away about my planner is that it’s UNDATED. That is huge for folks who feel once they’ve planned they are behind when the first sick day comes.

Not so with my undated planner. You simply stop schooling and pick up on the next lesson number.

In addition, my drive to do worksheets only turned to creating lapbooks for our unit studies for my kids. I have dozens of them for you here on my site.

I took a strength of organization and aligned it with a hands-on tool like lapbooks.

Finding the Non-School Homeschool Teacher Within

Look at these other ways you can use your strengths:

  • create a simple checklist of subjects for the day. Don’t tell the exacts if you want to add more delight-directed learning to your day. Simply put down your subjects like math, spelling, and vocabulary for the day. Challenge your kid to find a way to satisfy one of them with a non-traditional way to learn. Of course, don’t be like that lame artist or chef I mentioned earlier by not providing enough tools. Provide the tools and books and resources.
  • alternate subjects that you want covered like science and history instead of covering both on one day. This gives your child more time to research and delve into a topic.
  • provide visual communication of what you expect for the day. Visual communication like charts and calendars equals a powerful communicator.

One of the most important things to remember about relaxed or child-directed learning is that it looks different for each family.

One weave that is common among all families is that the parent is more of a facilitator. Tihs will help you to learn to blend your personality with homeschooling.

Think:

  • of your role as guiding instead of dictating,
  • how can you give more choices while still meeting your expectations for the day, and
  • how can I add other tools in my home so that passions are fed or discovered.
How to Mesh Your Personality With Homeschooling When They Collide.We bring our view of what is education to the homeschool world based on our experiences. That's not the shocking part. How to mesh our personality with homeschooling when they collide is the painful part. CLICK HERE if you want to go from structured to relax! #homeschool #homeschooling

Do not over complicate the process; use life happenings or natural things to be the teacher for you and your children.

Tip 5: Expand the definition of homeschool curriculum and use life happenings.

For example, use the seasons. Use springtime to make a garden, use winter to learn about winter birds or hibernation, use summer to learn about the ocean and ocean animals and used fall to learn about the cycles of life or the tides or moon.

Here are a few more of my units to help you get going and find the teacher within you and more important to mesh your personality with homeschooling.

The key to relaxed learning is use everything around you and everyday to teach.

The last important point to share is that you need to expand your definition of curriculum so your kids are not always sticking their nose in a book to learn something.

You know we love reading. A lot of homeschoolers are passionate about reading, but learning goes beyond that.

Look at 45 Ways to Define Homeschool Curriculum.

You’ve got this! Go now and conquer!♥

Hugs and love ya,