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When Homeschooling is Sucking the Life Out of You

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This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

I must be doing this wrong because homeschooling is sucking the life out of me. I hear it a lot and I felt like that at one time too. Also, look at my page The Dynamics of How to Homeschool Easily and Smarter for more tips and resources.

Too, a lot of families who bring kids from public school can find it harder to appreciate the homeschooling lifestyle; many families who have homeschooled from the beginning equally can struggle.

Add in the mix of kids’ lackadaisical attitude toward anything, let alone school work and you have a recipe for quitting.

When Homeschooling Is Sucking the Life Out of You

You may even feel public school is better for your kids.

When Homeschooling Sucks the Life Out of You

Although I don’t claim to have all the answers, from my over 20+ years of homeschooling from prek to high school AND conducting workshops with new homeschoolers, I do have tips that will help you.

Besides, I care. I mean I TRULY care about your success.

I KNOW the homeschooling lifestyle is a superior approach to education. I will tell you why in a minute.

Am I Selfish For Wanting to Send Them to Public School

Homeschooling being superior may not be a popular mindset among public school advocates, but I’m not here to win a popularity contest; I want to see you succeed without you feeling like you have to give life and limb for a lifestyle which is backed by numbers.

I’m here to tell you that you CAN succeed without tons of anxiety and stress and how it can be done.

First, it starts with knowing stats.

Don’t get me wrong, I love math and science, but it’s not the way I normally help people. However, we need to start with an analytical view before I speak from my heart.

When Emotions Are High Judgment Is Low

See when our emotions close in on us and doubt hits our day whether we’re doing enough or not, numbers like how much time we spend teaching our child doesn’t change.

What I’m saying is that one-to-one tutoring is a superior approach to thirty kids to one teacher. It’s simply a matter of odds and time.

Even at times when I felt I was at my breaking point like when my husband almost died, and my sister too, my kids learned way more at that time about what was really important.

Additionally because we did get behind when life hit hard, I was able to catch up far quicker than public school. We did NOT have to wait for a full school year or until other kids got the concepts.

My focus was simply my kids and my family. Although I didn’t feel like I was in control of my life and homeschool and sometimes I wasn’t, I know now that I definitely was.

Unless you’ve checked completely out, meaning you’re not doing one thing to teach your child like having meaningful conversations with him, reading to him, or playing with him, the odds are STILL in your favor of succeeding.

Also, get some more research and stats from this site National Home Education Research Institute to see how homeschoolers really are succeeding.

How to Go From a Crippled to Confident Mindset

I was making the best decisions based on the odds and time actually spent.

Whenever I feel that deep down nagging tug that I’m not doing enough, I remind myself of how much time it actually takes to homeschool.

We have time for many interruptions at home and still have time to make progress.

So I changed my mindset from a choice of sending my kids to public school as my default solution to one of using my time to make homeschool work to the best I could. Instead of putting energy into an approach where my kids odds of learning were actually lowered, I made the homeschooling lifestyle priority.

Next, before I jump into sharing multiple tried and true tips to cope when homeschooling sucks, I want you to know that I don’t believe one should homeschool at all cost.

That belief too is not exactly a popular one with some of the faith-based community.

With all of my heart I know that homeschooling is a superior approach because a child gets a uniquely individualized education; however, there are other factors like health, mental health, and even finances which deter some families.

Homeschooling your children is a very personal decision and one that a family should make for their children without guilt or judgment.

We really do not know what goes on inside of every family’s home and so I respect the decision each family has to make.

10 Tried and True Trips When Homeschooling Sucks

Next, look at these ten tips to cope when homeschooling is sucking the life out of you.

Tip. 1. Just STOP, STEP AWAY, and RESET.

First, we may think we have to keep pushing. Why do we do that to ourselves and our kids?

When in fact, from a complete stop comes rejuvenation, power, and refocus. Sometimes we can try to squeeze homeschooling into a busy life. We may need to stop and look at our schedule again to see what is really important to keep and what can we let go.

Tip 2. Deschool.

A lot is said about deschooling in the homeschool world. Some of it I agree with, other information not so much.

Deschooling is not just something you do when you’re a new homeschooler. It’s a technique for burn out too.

Look at some of these ways to use the deschooling process:

  • Do you need rest? STOP. Take care of your needs and your children’s physical needs. There is nothing selfish about self-care. A break does not mean a stop. It just means a break.
  • Did you jump from public school to homeschool without really taking the time to know how your children learn? Putting your child in the next grade because public school said they belong in a grade is a huge newbie mistake. It take times to know how your children learn and you can do that with inexpensive to free curriculum until you know your child’s learning personality.
  • Deschooling does not always mean idleness. Deschooling is different for each family. I know kids who do well with routine. However, can you scale back your expectations until whatever is the object of the stress subsides? Have you heard of the power of little done often? It’s true.

Furthermore, I share tips here on my video How to Deschool – Are You Doomed If You’ve Never Deschooled.

Tip 3. Do a Unit Study.

Additionally, I switched from boxed curriculum to unit studies many years ago.

Little did I recognize then the full and positive impact they would have on our day and now our journey.

Unit studies can take a bit more time to plan; the return is the satisfaction of learning exactly what interests us.

When homeschooling loses his luster, try a different approach. You may need to just switch approaches instead of quitting homeschooling.

Look at my post Top 5 Approaches New Homeschoolers Need to Know to know you’re following the approach that is best for your family and that you’re not repeating public school at home.

Tip 4. Use Nap Time to Tidy Up.

Moreover, if you have a younger household and still have naptime, use about 15 or 20 minutes of the time for a quick tidy up.

Even though it may not be the type of cleaning you really need, don’t forget the power of little. Every bit counts when you have a house full of littles.

I used to run myself almost completely ragged while two of my kids napped.

Twenty years later, I realized some of the time should have been spent relaxing and just sitting down to put my feet up.

Tip 5. Occupy the Older Kids with their Devices During Naptime.

Likewise, something else I shouldn’t have felt guilt about was allowing my older kids to be entertained while my young children slept.

Thinking I had to constantly school my kids when I was at the point of exhaustion was not balanced.

Homeschooling at all costs, even costing your health is not healthy.

It’s okay to allow kids time to entertain themselves while you rest.

Tip 6. Read.

In addition to using naptime to rest, reading has been one of my best ways to relax.

I read an article that stated: “researchers found that reading is one of the best ways to relax, and even six minutes can be enough to reduce the stress levels by more than two-thirds.“

Too, what I’ve learned now is that even if all we did was reading for the day it was enough.

My kid’s fondest childhood memories are of us reading together as a family.

Reading IS school; all the elements needed for learning like concentration, comprehending, and studying are associated with reading.

When Homeschooling Is Sucking the Life Out of You

Also, reading aloud to your kids has many key benefits, but remember taking time to read what you enjoy rejuvenates YOUR love of learning. That is equally important.

I know you’ll love my book, Homeschooling 31 Day Boot Camp for New Homeschoolers: When You Don’t Know Where to Begin.

5 BEST How to Homeschool Books

I've rounded up some of the best books to help you get started homeschooling.

Tip 7. Do a 4-Day Schedule.

Next, one year I switched to a 4-day schedule and never looked back. It’s true, at home we can accomplish more in less time.

However, until you try it you don’t really know.

When I switched to a 4-day schedule, it was one of the BEST things I did early in our journey.

I took off Monday to have a slower start to the beginning of the week. Taking time to get caught up on house cleaning, meal planning, and bill paying gave me a sense of control when my kids were very young.

As my kids grew older and could help more with chores, I switched to having off Friday as a day to rest and rejuvenate.

Look at my posts Should You Switch to a 4-Day Homeschool Schedule and The Sticking Power of a Solid Homeschool Schedule.

Tip 8. Take Time to Educate the Educator.

Another tip I learned was that some of my part in the feeling of lackluster towards homeschool was I didn’t take time to educate myself.

Why do we not think twice about dropping hundreds of dollars on our kids’ education, but don’t take time to learn how to choose curriculum or how to get organized?

Educating children is rewarding and at the same time it’s one of the most draining jobs I’ve ever done.

I needed the essentials in how to homeschool to smooth my path as I educate my children.

Many years, I ago I taught workshops to new homeschoolers and wrote a curriculum.

Having taught that workshop for 10 years, I now put those workshops online for you.

You’ll love my self-paced online workshops.

How-To Homeschool Courses

Go from Overwhelmed to Got this! The detailed courses: Teaching the Stages of Homeschool, How to Choose Curriculum for Beginners, Homeschool Organization for Beginners, and The New Homeschooler Boot Camp are real eye-openers. You already know homeschooling will give your child the most benefit. Now, take time to educate the person who loves your kids the most – YOU!

Tip 9. Find the Balance Between Rigid and Too Relaxed.

Furthermore, it seems when I’m not feeling the love of how easy homeschooling is supposed to be, I’ve had to look at my expectations.

Many homeschoolers are too rigid, but I’ve also seen more homeschoolers who don’t have a plan for the day.

Find out what your children need.

It’s not always a problem of being too rigid, but it could be you don’t have a list of expectations or a routine for the day.

Your children may need more routine instead doing school by knee-jerk reactions. Ouch. It’s hard to self-analyze – always.

Or, are you so rigid that your children feel crushed under the weight of unnecessary sternness?

Again, you are the only one to make this analysis. Achieving homeschool balance is possible if you’re willing to be flexible.

Tip 10. You are doing more than homeschooling AND your children need to know that too.

Finally, you’re doing more than homeschooling your children; you’re training them far beyond academics.

It’s flat out hard to parent while being a homeschool educator.

They’re intertwined. And you do not want to keep your two roles separate.

Because parenting and homeschooling are weaved together, your kids have responsibilities beyond their academics for the day.

Hear my heart when I say it’s hard to STOP and take time to train your kids to clean, cook, do chores and put away their toys or objects.

However, not only are you teaching them to be independent, you’re instilling pride and confidence.

Many kids who are grown lack self-confidence. Although doing chores is not a complete problem solver, it is a solution.

Chores give kids a sense of pride, belonging, and a way to help others.

Many years I had to accept a kid friendly cleaned house; it wasn’t always easy because I had high expectations.

However, I’m FOREVER grateful that instilled an ethic of hard work in each of my sons.

Is Homeschooling Really Freeing

Now that they have roommates, their roommates thank me for my sons’ positive mindsets and neat and clean habits.

Encourage your child to be a good friend when he is an adult.

It does start with his surroundings, taking care of his room, and other areas in the house.

I love when I get positive feedback from my son’s roommates and moreover I hope in the future, their spouses will too.

Respect comes first from caring for themselves and their area in your home; it pours over then into a child’s live when they’re away from you and now adults.

They extend that same courtesy to others and learn how to truly be happy.

What I’m saying is sometimes homeschooling is a heart problem and not a homeschooling problem.

What genuinely makes kids happy is being fulfilled each day no matter how small the task.

Do not forget that the odds are in your favor for succeeding.

Go slow and remember your kids deserve to know how to take care of themselves, clean, cook, know how to follow a schedule, and take care of others.

Kids will NEVER forget how you SKILLFULLY prepared them for life not just academics.

Don’t forget to think about what brought you to homeschooling in the first place and look up from the pit of despair.

Most circumstances are temporary at best although we don’t feel that way at the moment.

Having an online homeschool group is important too. You need to know you’re not alone. You’ll love my facebook group if you do facebook.

With Power Struggles Give Choices and Freedom

With plenty of rest or even stopping for a bit until you rekindle your love of homeschooling, I hope this heart to heart talk nudges you in the right decision for you family.

From my heart to yours, homeschooling has been worth every bit of stress and tears.

If you’re struggling right now, please let me hear from you. I may not have a solution, but I may be able to steer you in the right direction.

Look at these other tips:

Hugs and love ya,

Helpful Homeschool Unit Study Spines to Plan in a Few Hours

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This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

Homeschool unit study spines can make or break your unit study.

While you can use any living book for a great unit study, some resources are more helpful than others to help you plan quickly.

Helpful Homeschool Unit Study Spines to Plan in a Few Hours

Too, I’ve used many resources through my years of planning unit studies; choosing a spine is key to a successful unit study.

Before I jump into listing some helpful unit study spines, look below at the definition of a spine.

What is a Homeschool Unit Study Spine

A homeschool unit study spine can be a living book, magazine, mentor, reference book or chart, art or art object, play, musical piece, brochure, movie, encyclopedia, or any other type of book, object, or person which is the main reference or authority for your unit study topic.

In addition, a unit study spine is used to launch your lesson plans, topics, and sub-topics.

To easily plan, a superior spine will support additional ideas, projects, objectives, and concepts about the main topic.

It guides you down a trail to dive deep into the topic.

Look at my video How to Choose a Useful and NOT Useless Homeschool Unit Study Spine on my channel How to Homeschool EZ to understand what they are and how to choose them.

All research revolves around your spine; it is the backbone of your study and it is the main resource for your chosen theme.

Helpful Homeschool Unit Study Spines to Plan in a Few Hours

Additionally, depending on the type of unit study, some resources will be more helpful than others.

For example, if you’re doing a literature unit study, a beautiful dictionary is a must.

Also, as I moved away from all-in-one language arts, I used bar charts and quick study guides to zero in on skill subjects. To learn the difference between a skill and content subject read What Homeschool Subjects to Teach and When to Teach Them? Part 1 of 3.

Now look below at a few handy charts which promptly get to the nitty-gritty of language arts skills.

Further, while comparing and choosing books, here are features I look for when choosing a superior resource:

  • Background information about the topic in the text.
  • Ideas for hands-on projects.
  • Anecdotes.
  • Words for vocabulary.
  • Diagrams or charts.
  • Questions in the text or at the end.

With that being said, look at the breakdown for the different types of unit study spines which help you to plan in a few hours.

The very first reference books I started with were DK Eyewitness books.

They’ve improved through the years; they’re timeless. A wonderful collection is an inexpensive way to prep for a unit study beginner.

Science Homeschool Unit Study Spines

One of my favorite and timeless publishers is Nomad Press. They have many books which make for great themes. Look at some of them below.

Another set of books are the DK Smithsonian Encyclopedia which are keepers for science unit study spines.

Look at some of the timeless ones we have used below along with some new ones.

17 Favorite Unit Study Science Spines

I love to pair a living book about a topic with a reference book to use as spines. Sometimes, it’s easier to use a reference book as a spine and add living books as we go along. These are some of my favorite science spines.

Moreover, there are no shortages of books and references for nature; I prefer field guides which are concise nuggets while teaching a nature unit study.

Of course taking the guides to our outside classroom is the best reason.

Nature Homeschool Unit Study Spines

Further, many times I’ve used two unit study spines as companions.

For example, the resources I’ve listed above are reference books. I find reference books are extremely easy in helping me to plan a unit study because they put topics in a nutshell.

Living Books For Homeschool Unit Study Spines

However, along with a reference book, some unit studies are better taught alongside a living book.

I find when I add a living book, language arts becomes a natural fit and not a forced fit.

Living books contain two main important things.

  1. The book is written by an authority on the topic; and
  2. They are written in a narrative form meaning a book would explain events and give vivid details in a story form which engages the mind of readers.

In addition, a living book should stir a reader’s emotion and imagination even doing so in a picture book.

However, one of the best features of a living book is that a reader doesn’t realize that he is learning facts in a natural way. Living books are opposite of textbooks.

Lastly, I look for classic books, but they aren’t always living books. Foremost I look for a well-written book which has a high literary quality.

Adding a living book alongside a reference book has been the key to my family covering almost all the subjects in a unit study.

Below, I’ve listed just a few books we’ve used through years; I want you to have examples of living books for the various ages.

I’ve divided the living books into three sections or lower, middle, and upper reading levels.

Also, keep in mind I’m giving you examples of them and then you can decide where to add them to topics.

Living Books for Beginning Reading Levels

Living Books for Middle Reading Levels

Additionally, look at these examples of living books for middle school.

Living Books for Upper Reading Levels

Moreover, a series of books like the Shakespeare Can Be Fun introduces sophisticated literature to younger kids in a fun way.

Let a young learner’s introduction to Shakespeare be one he understands. There is plenty of time in middle and high school to learn about literary terms.

Next, I want to share a few more reference books which I’ve used plentifully. The books below are by Chicago Review Press.

Even though these resources are some of my favorite, they are by no means an exhaustive list. My focus in this roundup is to give you visual examples of unit study spines which ease lesson planning by giving you a plethora of examples.

How Unit Study Spines Are Cost Effective

In conclusion, but certainly not less important is knowing the value of unit study spines. Homeschool unit study spines are cost effective for several reasons:

  • spines cover many ages and that means I divide the price by how many years I’m using it or by how many kids are using it for one year,
  • there is less waste of resources because we choose exactly what we want to study,
  • because unit studies are a mastery approach, less money is spent on covering one topic for several years, and
  • spending less time on curriculum which may not cover our specific educational goals and focusing exactly on my kids’ needs is not only a huge savings, but an outstanding education.

What do you think? Are you ready to give unit studies a try?

You’ll love these other unit study helps:

Hugs and love ya,

How To Juggle Homeschool When You’re Coping With More Than A Mom Should

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This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

I was going to create a long video on how to juggle homeschool when you’re coping with more than a mom should, but I didn’t. In my short facebook live video on my group, I do talk about it a little.

Although I’m not a weepy person, the truth of it is if I created a longer video, I couldn’t get through it without weeping and airing my raw emotions.

Why Juggle Homeschool During Extreme Stress

That’s not a negative for me; I want you to know what is working and not working for me. It’s important to me that you have some tips to ease your load and know that you’re not alone.

Read my words, but feel my raw emotions as I pour them out to you. I hope to encourage and lift you up in my transparency.

Circumstances are different for every mom, but the same raw emotions ebb and flow. You don’t have to feel the exact same pain as another to put yourself in another’s shoes.

What I went through years ago as far as crisis in my life pales into comparison to what I’ve recently been through and am going through. More on that in a minute.

How To Juggle Homeschool When You're Coping With More Than A Mom Should

Life wasn’t finished beating me or my family up. The longer you homeschool which is living life, the more stress can head your way.

When You’re A Control Freak But You Have No Control – None

So why keep homeschooling? More on that in a minute too.

Also, keeping things to your self is not always a good thing. You couldn’t possibly know what a very private person I am, but I am. I love my family and try to be dignified with their feelings and privacy.

It’s important for me to to not overshare. Know that there are things I must keep private; I’m walking a line here.

However, understanding what I’ve been through I hope I can reduce your stress and anxiety; I want you to know that sending your kids off to public school is not always the least stressful thing to do.

Life Can be Like the Cycle on The Dryer. Tumble, tumble, tumble. (Beat you up). Wait. Catch Your Breath. Hold on. REPEAT.

It was enough then and is enough now, but I have no choice as more is heaped on me.

First, look at what was heaped on me then.

One year my sister who homeschooled her kids got a staph infection.

First Sign of Homeschool Stress – What Will YOU Do

She had to be intubated because she couldn’t breathe and was unconscious for days. I cared for her in the ICU, comforted her kids and the whole family while taking care of my kids and husband.

Driving to get there when I first found out, I wondered if she would make it. Facing fear is not easy. It’s the kind of stress and sickness you feel that brings you to your knees and makes you puke.

Thankfully, she had wonderful doctors, the infection was contained and she was sent to a long-term facility for months.

Driving to see her and support her 40 minutes away from my house 4x a week or more was exhausting. My kids were with me the whole time. I thought that year would never end.

However, I had no clue what the next year held for me.

My husband had a massive heart attack. It was also the year my first son got to high school.

You know high school is scary enough, but it had nothing on what we went through that year. Yes, my husband beat the widow maker.

Vividly, I recall that day years ago. I shared with many of you who still follow me how I agonized over choosing the right words when you think they may be your last to your husband.

I finally made it to my husband’s side at the hospital in time to be with him while the doctors shuffled my husband off to surgery and saved his life. That night which I’ve never shared was one of the loneliest nights I’ve ever been through.

Knowing how close I came to life changing forever, I cried all night alone.

Some Stress Is Unavoidable

Next, the long year to recovery and hubs changing jobs was ahead.

Did I mention too that folks want to give you all kinds of nutritional advice assuming your lifestyle contributed to his heart attack?

I never shared before that he inherited heart disease from both sides of his family and his heart attack although happening while he was young, didn’t happen at 40 years old like his father and great grandmother before him.

Matter of fact, the doctors said it was our lifestyle which saved his life because of how stress free we tried to lead our life.

Life as I knew it went back to some kind of normal. However, my kids and I were forever changed.

Knowing the value of how you never know what the next day holds, we seized the time time together as a family and made a big change in our life.

We sold our huge home with pool and packed what we wanted in two cases for each of us and moved overseas to South America.

It was the BEST decision we ever made. Our years spent together in adventure was just what we need to get over what we couldn’t control.

Is Returning to Public School the Answer

Look at these four things that my kids and I learned from those years of hardship.

  1. We drew closer together as a family. If I had to put my kids in public school, we would have been separated at a time we needed each other. However, I weathered the storm remembering that it is just that. That means it’s temporary.
  2. It taught my kids to seize moments of friendship both in the family and with their friends outside of the family. You don’t know what will change this afternoon.
  3. Although I worried my sons may have grown up too fast, in fact teaching them to stand with me as we face feared helped them to set reasonable standards for themselves during our crisis. Even adults today don’t know when to stop putting pressure on themselves when under enough strain.
  4. Homeschooling is all about modeling how I want to my kids to learn meaningful things. What would I be teaching them if I didn’t set the example on what their focus should be when life hits hard? Everything I believe in about the homeschooling lifestyle came full circle. In life, sometimes we need to be a caregiver. I knew their academics wouldn’t be interrupted too long, but my kids’ education reaches far beyond academics.

Next, you want to take a self-check. Long term stress can cause terrible emotional and physical harm.

There is a difference between BENDING and BREAKING. You never want to get to the point of breaking.

With all of my heart I believe our emotional and mental health while homeschooling is not talked about enough.

There should be NO judgment or feeling like you’re weak or less if you send your kids to public school.

Choosing to Look on the Bright Side – A Choice

At this point, I’ve not had to seek professional help, but have not ruled it out if I need it. Seeking professional help is a sign of strength and not weakness. It means you care about your health and the health of your kids.

Bodies react differently to stress.

I allowed the stress to bend me although many days I feel like breaking. In my heart of hearts I knew what was right for my family.

But that wasn’t all I learned, I also learned:

  • If I sent my kids to public school that there was no way I could have the flexibility to care for my sister and husband on my terms.
  • You’re told to live one day or one moment at a time, but you embrace the true meaning when you experience extreme stress.
  • Control what I really had control of. That means I couldn’t let my mind worry about things that were not on my plate for that day. I saved my energy for what I’m experiencing NOT what I think I MAY experience. I was turning my load to anxiety and had to rein that back in. Do you know how REALLY hard that TRULY IS? There is a line between staying ahead of caring for all what is on your plate versus unnecessary worrying.

How to Power Through Homeschool During a Crisis (The Second Time)

Recalling all of what I just shared with you, I’ve been hit hard AGAIN.

Look at what I’m currently dealing with.

My husband is experiencing more complications with his heart. Each day is a precious day. For now, he is good, but managing his health is on my plate again.

My mother is now at end stage renal disease.

This is weighing heavy on my heart. Not only does she have to go to dialysis 3x a week, but she had a stoke and has continued to decline in health. Did you know seizures follow because of the stroke?

Although we’re managing my mom’s care daily, there is no controlling what you can’t control.

There is just letting my mother know what a treasure she is when she can understand me.

Seeing your mother go from an extremely intelligent, compassionate, and caring woman to almost a child is gut-wrenching daily.

But again, I remember whatever I feel is not anything I know my mother is going through. That keeps me going daily. All my mother knows right now is that I love her deeply and she loves me deeply. There will never be enough words to tell her how precious she is to me, but I try daily.

My mother-in-law now lives in an assisted living and my husband and I manage her care as well. Right now, she’s been exposed to Covid and with the onset of dementia, we constantly remind her daily of what is going on.

Did I mention my dad is now 80 years old and has his own set of health problems which needs to be managed while he helps care for my mom?

Any given day, I’m not sure which one of my family members will need help for the day.

Currently many days are not all my own to plan or juggle homeschool units.

How to Plan When You Can’t Catch A Break

However, I choose to trek forward. Look at five mindsets I’m utilizing now as I manage in STEPS.

  1. Ask: What TRULY is important to me today? That is my ONE goal for the day.
  2. Live today, not worry about tomorrow. This one is really hard for me because I’m a planner. Instead of worrying what may happen to any of the precious people in my life right now, I save my energy and passion for dealing with what is REALLY happening.
  3. Identify the difference between stress and anxiety. I’m still learning new things. Stress is unavoidable because it involves life. Stress turns to anxiety when I worry about things that may never happen. All I have done is add anxiety instead of keeping my mind and body healthy.
  4. Know when to stop homeschooling and when to cut back. I know now that my sons could have never gone to public school because they felt they would have missed what was going on at home. I had to think about their feelings. Knowing when to get help either online, by a tutor, or when to stop for a short time is paramount. Weigh EACH day as it’s happening instead of planning like life is normal until it is again.
  5. Self-care for the caregiver is necessary. (I know, but heart my heart. It’s NECESSARY). Passing out is not a good when you’re the caregiver. When so much is on your shoulders, you have to find time even if it’s a short time to rejuvenate. Many days I am physically EXHAUSTED, but waking up REALLY early when all is quiet has calmed my nerves and allows me to think. I spend the time thinking, meditating, and reading. Sure, I’m physically exhausted a lot of days, but my mental and emotional health needs the recovery. Not every day can I get up that early, but a few days a week it has become necessary. Find time whether really LATE or really EARLY to feed your mental health.

Adopt Compassion Over Compulsion

The biggest lesson I’ve learned is compassion over compulsion. Compassion moves a person to try to spare the suffering of others. Compulsion is what a person does by rote or grudgingly.

Deep in my raw and exposed heart, I know I can’t relieve any of the things going on in my family right now. But by me being there for all of them every day and my words, they know they are not alone as they face challenges every day.

When to Let Others Know And When to Let them In

Lastly, even machines are made with escape valves. I’m no machine, I’m not unusually strong, but I choose to share with others. Writing about this is self-help like one wise homeschool mom told me.

Life is precious and each of these people in my life didn’t ask for this to happen to them, but I manage each day as it comes up.

Yes, I would like to go back to a nothing but homeschooling life and blogging, but it probably won’t be for a while.

Tell me friend, can you relate? Has life thrown at you more than your fair share? Have you lost someone dear to you or have had a terrible setback? I don’t have all the answers, but know I TRULY care.

How To Juggle Homeschool When You're Coping With More Than A Mom Should

Look at these other tips on how to juggle homeschool when life hits hard:

Hugs and love ya,

How to Choose the Best Middle School Literature And Favorite Resources

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This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

Today in how to choose the best middle school literature I want to help you conquer the overwhelm by giving you a few seasoned homeschooler secrets.

Best Middle School Literature

When I approached the middle school years, there was no lack of middle school literature lists.

I loved having the lists, but I quickly learned that having tips on how to choose literature for my teen was better.

So first, look at these four questions asked and answered full of tips to help you decide which books are best for your family.

Four Middle School Literature Questions Asked and Answered

How to Choose the Best Middle School Literature And Favorite Resources

Question 1.
Should I Read Every Book My Child Reads?

The answer is complicated. It’s both yes and no. The way you determine if it’s a yes or no is your purpose.

For example, if you’re wanting to use literature for analysis and to engage your child with understanding an author’s purpose it’s hard to do that unless you read the book.

Middle school is the time that most kids can do some introductory analysis. If you’re wanting to fill the literature requirement for just reading or for enjoyment, the answer is no.

I couldn’t read every book my kids chose, but focused on reading the few we would used for analysis. That secret tip helped me conquer the literature overwhelm in middle school.

In addition, this site for Banned and Challenged Books gives you an idea of the theme or worldview behind some books.

Question 2.
How many books should my kid read each year?

That is another subjective answer. Some kids are voracious readers others not so much.

But if you’re using the literature to fill a credit (yes you can get high school credit in middle school), you’ll want to set your goal for a realistic amount.

Looking over some literature lists for middle schooled kids, I’ve seen some unreachable numbers.

Whatever the number of books you come up with lower it. It’s so much better to get through a handful of books with meaningful discussions than to overestimate and rush through them.

That is disheartening for both teacher and kid. Remember you can always add more literature for analysis anytime during the year.

I’ve had different requirements with each kid as my circumstances were different each year, but a good rule of thumb at this age was to analyze between 4 to 6 books or less.

Some years we did more, other years I struggled to get through three books, but it was still solid language arts.

The other books were pure pleasure and met my reading requirement.

Reading for Middle School

Again, this is NOT all your child will read, but it’s the amount you want him to read to help him with the critical thinking part of literature.

Question 3.
Do I want my child to integrate other subjects or skills or to use literature as stand-alone?

My answer is to integrate as much as possible. My preference from the time I learned about how to integrate was to use this method for all literature.

Integrate means to combine several skills or to combine subjects. By integrating skills or subjects,

  • your child learns the practical application of grammar, vocabulary, or writing in a way that makes sense;
  • the areas of language arts that your child is weak at can be strengthened. For example, he sees the correct spelling of a word in literature and applies it to his writing;
  • your child can choose literature choices based on his interests or to cover a subject he may not like as well. Unlike public school, your child doesn’t have to follow arbitrary lists. Too, if he is not passionate about history, then well-written fiction prose can help him to fill a history credit. Literature can make a history time period come alive while filling both a literature and history requirement in a more fun way; and
  • one unexpected benefit was that my kids learned study skills and research skills.

Literature Analysis for Middle School

Question 4.
Should I require my child to write book reports?

Although it’s not necessary for kids to write book reports, understanding the purpose of a book report lets you decide if it’s for your family.

Book reports, oral or written, are the blueprints for high school literary analysis.

The point is not whether you assign a book report or not, it’s that your child understands things like elements of fiction, genre, and figures of speech.

Whether you choose to do this orally, through a book report, a lapbook, or reading journal, it’s your choice. I have only one kid that loved book reports, but I orally reviewed with each kid the assigned books.

Next, look at this list of questions to include in a written book report or to go over them orally:

  • Was it better that . . . ?
  • What do you think . . . ?
  • In your opinion . . . ?
  • How would you change the character to . . . ?
  • How is ____ tied in or related to ____?
  • What choice would you have made ____?

Now that you have a quick overview of some of the general tips about how to choose middle school literature, look at this list of books.

Remember that you can choose classics, follow a history theme, favorite author or do a balance of genres. There are many genres to choose from.

Of course, if your child is college bound you will want to do a variety of genre even in junior high.

Reading for Middle School Homeschool

And one final thought there is a huge difference in maturity between sixth grade and eighth grade.

Keep that in mind in looking over this literature list as I provided options for different reading levels. This list below is a mix of literature that works well for this age, but you can always add to it.

Books for Middle School Kids

Alternatively, you may want to use something besides just a reader or the literature.

Teacher Guides, Themed Guides and All-in-One Curriculum

For my first time teaching literature at the middle school level I loved using teacher helps and many times I used them as life happened. Why reinvent the wheel?

You can choose a book along with a teacher guide to help you teach the important parts of the book or use an all-in-one guide or curriculum.

Look at some of your options below.

How to Choose the Best Middle School Literature And Favorite Resources

I love Lightning Literature and they’re perfect for the older grades because they have a schedule which helps when you’re first beginning to teach literature.

Still, I had the tendency to over teach literary analysis, but key to keeping it fun is to do a bit each day.

Then, Language Arts Through Literature series is timeless. Their middle and high school grades are solid.

It is a Charlotte Mason gentle approach to literature and fits a lot of my likes; it takes an integrated approach which aligns with how I feel beautiful literature should be learned.

However, one of my VERY favorite resources for middle school kids was created by another homeschool mom.

You’ll love Literary Adventures for Kids which is online and self-paced. You choose the books and course and your child goes at his own pace. All the stress and prep for learning about literature was taken out.

If you’re looking for something that your child can do on his own, or you don’t have time to read every book, you’ll love Literary Adventures for Kids.

Also, Progeny Press Study Guides have been timeless.

My kids can pick the book they want to read and we find the accompanying study guide. The guides cover background information, vocabulary, literary analysis, and more.

In addition, be sure you check out the discounted resources at Homeschool Buyers Co-op Language Arts section. There are many discounted providers for literature guides.

More Resources for Middle School Tips

Homeschool Helps for Middle School

Another favorite has been the literature unit guides by Teacher Created Resources. Although they are created for a classroom, I’ve been able to get many ideas to flesh out with my kids.

Additionally, Memoria Press literature guides are grade level literature units which also have helped me at this age.

Next, Beautiful Feet literature are some of my favorite themed literature units.

Covering history and literature simultaneously helped us to learn how to utilize our time and widen our reading diet.

If your child loves history, then integrating history and literature together makes practical use of your child’s time.

Did I mention that reading doesn’t become a chore, but becomes a time you and your child look forward to during the day?

Finally, paying attention to detail looks different for each book with each child, but that is the purpose of literature analysis. Too, our children can come to view each book loved as an artistic expression. It’s quite possible.

What books are you using for literature analysis for middle school kids?

Hugs and love ya,

How to Build Elementary Homeschool Curriculum Directly From Amazon

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This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

How to build elementary homeschool curriculum directly from Amazon is easier than you think. Also, look at my page How To Homeschool Elementary Students Like A Pro.

Whether you’ve homeschooled from the beginning or suddenly have been thrown into homeschooling, you’ll love the flexibility of being able to choose from Amazon.

I love supporting vendors who sell homeschool curriculum, but in person conventions did not happen everywhere this year because of the pandemic.

How to Build Elementary Homeschool Curriculum Directly From Amazon

Having an option to build your elementary homeschool curriculum is vital and I made this easy for you by creating lists in my Amazon store.

Also, I have options for middle and high school. Click here for How to Build High School Curriculum Directly From Amazon and here for How to Build Middle School Curriculum Directly From Amazon.

Elementary Homeschool Curriculum Directly From Amazon

First, the essential subjects that you want to teach in the elementary years are language arts, math, history and science.

Of course this doesn’t mean these are the only ones, but those four are the basis for a solid foundation.

Too, in the elementary years one-to-one tutoring does not take as long as the academic load that homeschooled kids in the upper grades carry. While it’s true a younger child may need more breaks, the workload is still pretty flexible in the elementary years and you have time to add other subjects for enrichment.

Now that you understand the 4 BIG ones as I call them, you also need to know how to break down language arts components.

Here are the components of language arts and based on your child’s age, ability, or level, you need to decide which ones he will need to do.

  • Reading. This includes reading aloud.
  • Phonics. Normally you want to do this until about 4th grade.
  • Spelling. Phonics is the precursor to spelling. Don’t be so quick to teach formal spelling because a child needs input first which phonics does.
  • Penmanship (no this is not composition). This is just what it means, learning how to write. It’s done in the early grades.
  • Composition comes after penmanship and it is about teaching a child how to compose his thoughts.
  • Grammar. Normally you start this in the second or third grade.

Language Arts Curriculum from Amazon

Keep in mind the subjects you cover in the elementary grades are just a rule of thumb.

Because kids can be all over the place on levels, I am giving you the big picture so you know how to choose.

It’s worrisome to not know which subjects to introduce and when to introduce them. I want you to be in the know.

So look at the subjects below based on grade level.

  • If your child is at grades 1 or 2, you want to choose a reading program, a phonics program, and a writing program.
  • If you child is at grades 3 to 4, you want to choose a reading program, a phonics program, a spelling program, a writing program or composition program and a grammar program.
  • If your child is at grades 5 to 6, you want to choose a reading program, a composition program, a spelling program, and a grammar program.
  • Science and history can be as easy as reading a book in the earlier grades and then progress to taking more time like from 3rd grade on.

Curriculum from Amazon

Also, to be sure you’ve covered the bases for subjects, use my checklist for curriculum resources below

You can download an editable copy over at STEP 5A of my free 7 Step Homeschool Planner.

Additionally, I have this super helpful post How to Know What A Homeschooled Child Should Learn Yearly.

Now, look at lists I’ve created for you to give you choices on the different variety of curriculum.

By using the guideline above where I explain what to choose in each grade, you’ll be sure you won’t miss any vital curriculum for a grade.

Homeschool History and Science from Amazon

In addition, history and science are considered core subjects in some states.

Here is the Elementary – History & Geography List and here is the Elementary – Science List.

After you add the Big Four core subjects, you can add other subjects. By starting with the Big Four, you know that you have the essentials covered.

If you have many learners under the age of 7 or 8, then covering the Big Four for the day is solid. As your little ones get older and as you have time, you can add other subjects which interest your kids.

Sometimes lesson plans can be too lofty for the elementary ages, but remember play is still a huge part of the learning day too. There is no need to fill your day with too many subjects.

How to Build Elementary Homeschool Curriculum Directly From Amazon

The Big Four subjects a.k.a. language arts, math, science and history are the same ones all the way to High School. There is a lot of years to cover those subjects so include plenty of hands-on activities too.

Elementary Homeschool Curriculum

Look at these other tips I have for you:

How to Build Elementary Homeschool Curriculum Directly From Amazon

The beauty of choosing curriculum directly from Amazon is that you not only can meet your kids’ needs, but also meet state guidelines if you have them.

You’re off to a great start this year!