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Second Chance Homeschooling. Can We Have Do-Overs?

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This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

Second Chance Homeschooling

Taking Mr. Senior 2013 back out of Kindergarten after putting him in for Kindergarten at the beginning of the year, I knew I had a second chance for homeschooling.

If you are struggling with gearing back up for the school year, I want to share a few pointers that helped me to plod along.

I believe in second chances and do-overs in homeschooling.

Second Chance Homescholing. We can have them. @ Tina's Dynamic Homeschool Plus

There are so many things in life that we can’t do over, but homeschooling is not one of them.

If you didn’t get covered what you wanted to last year, make it a priority this year. Priority means first. You get a second chance.

New Beginnings

If you are sheepishly returning to homeschool because putting your children back in public or private school didn’t work, don’t pick up where you left off.

Determine first if it was the homeschool or because life happened that made you return to public school.

If you just pick up where you left off without examining what was the stress inducer, you could be setting yourself up for another disappointment.

Hear my heart on this next point.

3 Important Truths To Remember When Beginning AGAIN

We read so much about leaving guilt at the door, but not enough about analyzing it. If we had no feelings of guilt, what kind of mom would we be? Would we even be viewed as human?

Having feelings of guilt means that we are aware of our weaknesses and we realize there is a standard.

I feel this way when I can’t live up to God’s standards. It keeps me aware of my weaknesses and that there is a standard I desire to live by. I strive to do better next time.

Balance is required though because we can’t get that confused with trying to be a perfectionist homeschooler.

Are our feelings of guilt because we couldn’t marry our expectations of unrealistic homeschooling with what we could actually do? Then that thinking needs to be left behind.

Analyzing but not constant agonizing over past mistakes keeps us balanced.

If we always tend to contemplate on how we are not doing enough in our day it can erode our homeschooling.

Erosion is a slow process and then we may sabotage our own homeschool because we give up.

Remember, these 3 key ways to get on a different path when you are beginning again.

 1. analyze guilt but don’t agonize over it;

2. don’t be confused between guilt feelings of trying to school by a higher standard and having perfectionist standards that nobody can meet. Good can come out of trying harder next time; and

3. avoid erosion which is constant wearing down.

If it is our thinking we need to change, if we need to join a support group, if we need to leave a support group or if we need minimal contact with naysayers, then take positive actions to do it now to keep your joy in homeschooling.

Each year negative things can take stabs at our every day joy. It’s hard for even the strongest homeschooler to not get wore down. So remove things that can make your homeschool backslide.

I do think that at the end of my homeschool journey that I might want a do over on something, but I won’t ever regret trying to make it right this year.

I was inspired by this quote today as I don’t want to let go of what I have learned from the past years.

“The knowledge of the past stays with us. To let go is to release the images and emotions, the grudges and fears, the clingings and disappointments of the past that bind our spirit.”

Hugs and love ya,

Also, check out these articles:

Are You Qualified to Teach Your Homeschooled Children?
3 Tips from the Pros Before You Become a Homeschool Educator

It’s Tough To Start Back Over Again – But Well Worth It

The Great Homeschool Hoax – Public School At Home?

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This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

Like a lot of new homeschoolers, I too just copied the public school system in everything from keeping a similar schedule, to curriculum selection, and even testing my first child, Mr. Senior 2013.

Public School at Home

You see, I was doing public school at home.

I hadn’t embraced the freedom that homeschooling offered. I was afraid.

I was afraid that I wouldn’t be able to lesson plan, to teach all of my children at one time, that my children were going to be behind, that I needed testing for grade placement, that my kids need other children their age and that I would totally fail them as an educator.

The Great Homeschool Hoax – Public School At Home. Understanding the two COMPLETELY different approaches is key by Tina Robertson

Did I mention I even had feelings of guilt questioning myself if I was a good mother?

Why do we do that as moms?

I agree that today is so much more easier to homeschool because of all the resources available to us.

However, in one particular way homeschooling was easier way back when because homeschoolers then grasped the full meaning of homeschooling.

About 10 years or so ago, public school at home providers popped up and became popular.

The meaning of homeschooling has become obscured because these companies tout that they support homeschooling. They may or may not.

Can You Really Have One Foot in Homeschool and One in Public School?

Until you let go of the public school at home mentality which models everything after the public school and where you are only assisting your children at home while somebody else teaches them, you will never embrace the freedom homeschooling offers.

Public School at Home Characteristics

  • biggest difference – government controlled
  • normally offered online
  • have testing required
  • have parent and teacher conferences
  • maintain a public school schedule
  • curriculum is put together by educational consultants even though public school at home touts that you as the parent choose readers or have some choice. You may or may not.
  • can be accredited
  • tout they are free because they are public school and public school is free
  • have a teacher assigned to your child
  • a curriculum is one grade level straight across the board a/k/a boxed curriculum or one size fits all.
  • mostly uses textbooks. Some online school use only textbooks while others throw in a few classical readers.
  • schedule is set up to complete on their timetable. Though many programs offer flexibility because they are government controlled, schedules have to be maintained.

If this sounds like the arrangement you just left, then why would you want to repeat it at home?

Homeschool Characteristics

  • biggest difference – parent controlled
  • you can choose all online curriculum, part physical books or mix and match
  • testing becomes the right of the parent who knows the child best and understands that a test is nothing more than a tool
  • conferences are not needed because as the tutor of your children you know what they’re learning. Even if you just begin to homeschool, it doesn’t take long for you to know exactly which subjects your child excels in and which subjects he will need support for.
  • your schedule is adopted based on your family’s needs and not based on an outdated school schedule, which was set up based on a society that was much more agricultural than our society is today.  If schooling year round suits your family, you simply begin and don’t need approval by a governmental agency.
  • curriculum is put together by a parent because she knows the child the best. If the curriculum is not working, it can be changed on a dime. Being in control doesn’t mean you can’t use something laid out by another company, but then that is your choice.
  • accreditation is no longer a term which homeschoolers fear because they know it doesn’t have anything to do with the value of an education. Be sure to read my article, Accreditation – Removing the Shroud of Mystery.
  • homeschoolers know that public school at home is not free. It may be cost-free, but given up freedom like control, having stressful deadlines for testing and parent teacher conferences cost.  Many homeschool educuators give up well-paying jobs because their desire to stay home with their kids is greater than their desire to pursue a career they may even be passionate about.  They know that homeschooling for excellence doesn’t always mean having the most expensive curriculum though they are willing to sacrifice other things if a pricier curriculum is better. Be sure to read my article, Is Homeschooling Expensive? Check out this Essential Guide in How to Homeschool Well on a Budget.
  • children are tutored one-to-one by their parents. Reports show that parents play a major role in their child having above normal intelligence when tutored.
  • the parent stays in control of whether they should purchase a grade level in a box or mix and match grade levels adjusted to the child’s natural abilities.
  • homeschool families don’t have to settle for a few well placed classical or living books placed into a curriculum, but can choose living books consistently.
  • the homeschool schedule is completely flexible to adjust to the needs of the family each year.

There is not anything that the public school at home approaches offers that an informed and hardworking educator at home can’t overcome.

If it’s structure you crave, then choose a laid out program where you are not having constant interference from an outside source.

If you need a more budget friendly curriculum be sure to check out my post Digital Homeschool Curriculum – Big Ol’ List.

Pursuing sports, music, art or any other extra curricular involvement is done easier when you set up your schedule to fit your children’s passion.

Being in control of my children’s education is one of the most satisfying and fulfilling jobs as a mother and parent I ever could have.

We were never promised it would be easy in raising our children, but they are blessings.

What we are assured of is that we will be provided with what we need to aim our children at their targets.

I have been blessed over and over many times, but not without some tears shed, lots of elbow grease, lots of prayers and a dogged determination to stick to what is best for my family. You can too!

Don’t forget so easily what many homeschoolers who homeschooled in the past knew, which is that homeschooling is a precious and extraordinary way of education that doesn’t mix with any other approach.

Look at some of these other resources that will help you to stick to the homeschooling approach.

Hugs and love ya,

The Great Homeschool Hoax - Public School at Home @ Tina's Dynamic Homeschool Plus

What Do You Fear Most About Homeschooling?

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This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

What do you fear most about homeschooling?  If we could see the list of others, whose list would be longer?

  • Fear that I won’t prepare my kids for the world outside of my home.
  • Fear that my extended family that is watching ever so close will inspect us at the end of the year to see if we failed.
  • Fear that I won’t guide my children to fulfill their God given talents to the best of their ability.
  • Fear of being a perfectionist on top of that being unorganized – is that possible?
  • Fear that I will miss some vital subject.
  • Fear that my children will get behind.
  • Fear that I am the only one that loses patience with my kids.
  • Fear that I am the only one where public school looks like the perfect solution on some days.

Does your list look similar?

What would make you more confident?

Knowing that you are not alone in your fears and knowing what worked and what did not work for others is encouraging.
However, there is one noteworthy step in my experience that stand outs among all others and that is goal setting.

What Do You Fear Most About Homeschooling @ Tina's Dynamic Homeschool Plus

Goals are not only essential but they are crucial.

Fears are normal in the beginning when homeschooling, but what is more important to remember is that you are now swimming upstream so to speak.  You are going against the norm and that requires hard work.

Goals energize us to stay focused on our family’s needs.

We will avoid just floating along, responding to the moment or jumping ship to adopt the newest trend in homeschooling when our goals are specific and measurable.

The second important thing to remember is that your journey will be unique.

This point is so important I want to say it again.

Though some of your experiences will mirror my experiences and other homeschoolers, they will not all be the same.

How to Make a Strong Start in Homeschooling

Bottom line is you have to be able to measure progress for your own unique journey and you need a way to do that.

Look at how setting goals reduces fears, gives you very specific ways to measure the progress of your unique family and fortifies you for each year.

  • We make progress based on our family’s need.
  • Instead of wasting time checking out all the latest trends in homeschooling, we are analyzing our own efforts and measuring progress within our own family.
  • We avoid boredom and a stagnant year because we are focused on whether we need to speed up our homeschooling journey or slow it down to meet our family’s need.
  • Homeschooling is more purposeful and inspirational because out time is focused on meeting goals instead of coasting along.

Though I have made some pretty pages for you to write your homeschool goals on, you can write them anywhere.

I tout it all the time and that is though goals may sound good in our mind, when we put them to paper they are concrete.

Don’t ever forget what brought you to homeschooling in the first place.

If our goals and reasons are not in plain sight each day we give in to fear.

As time passes, it happens to all us and that is we forget why we chose homeschooling as a superior education.  Those reasons quell any fears and keeps us plodding forward.

Like the subjects we teach our children, reminders are needed throughout the years when fears resurface.

Overcoming fears happens by not only arming yourself with homeschool knowledge but with goals.

When your goals are met each year, you don’t need the validation of others, either by testing or by family approval.

What are your fears about homeschooling? Where are your goals?

Hugs and love ya,

Tina 2015 Signature

Also, check out these other posts.

When You Feel Like a Homeschool Failure

When does homeschooling become “normal”?

 

When Homeschooled Kids Are Not Excited About Ordinary Days

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This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

Hearing other homeschoolers say how excited their child is about a new unit study, a new curriculum or the new school year when you may feel your child is not can certainly make you feel alone.

Do you have a child that is only thinking about what is required so he can spend the rest of the day playing, on the computer or his device?

Facing head on potential road blocks in our homeschool journey like when homeschooled kids are not excited about ordinary days or about anything pertaining to learning is the way I always prefer to tackle hurdles but I didn’t always feel so confident.

Do you feel that homeschooling is like choosing  the lesser of two evils? You are in good company and not alone.
When I started homeschooling I had conjured up a vision that because my education lacked in many areas that my sons would be bright-eyed and eager to learn every day.

I was excited to learn about all of the things I never did in school, but also I was determined to make my sons’ experiences different than mine.
Back to reality, I have had many times when the only thought on my boys’ mind was when is school going to be done so they can get on the computer, turn on the game or eat the left over pizza in the refrigerator.

Guess what? That is why they are not in charge. Let me share a few of my coping techniques.

Whose job is this anyway?

Early on I made it clear to my sons that it is their job to learn even if I am the most boring teacher.

Just like I would be working on my teaching skills, I made sure my kids knew what their role was in homeschooling.
Don’t think that parents who pull their kids out of public school in which they may have had a bad experience are the only ones that deal with a spoon-fed mentality by kids.

Learning to learn is a process for our kids. It is cultivated and nurtured through time and experiences.
There are many days our kids want to just play mindless games and sit back while we spoon feed them.  They are really no different than us if we give in to that inner person or side of our personality that just doesn’t want to show up some days to teach.

The difference between our kids and us of course is not only age but the ability to see the disastrous results if we live our life or homeschool in a mindless way.

Like us, the first step in getting children infused with learning is to teach them that what they can control is to show up at school with a positive attitude.

I have found through the years that instead of putting down how they may feel about homeschooling, I give it merit or validate it.

When our children see that we too as adults have the same feelings at times, it not only makes them feel that they are not alone, but that they can share the negative side of homeschooling and not be chastised for it.

Communicating true feelings even when our homeschooling may be boring is a wake up reminder that we might need to change a few things.
Attitude is the first subtle change to making a difference in our learning and that is something that nobody else can control.

If my children are old enough to cop an attitude about learning, they are old enough to start understanding the disastrous results.

I find it is better to be frank, set boundary lines for learning and explain why you have them for your children than for them to think life is going to be about eating their favorite leftovers of cold pizza each day.

A lot of things in life are just about doing things that we find boring and mundane but we will show up.

“I am not an entertainment act.“

We carry a lot of guilt as moms and negative thinking can make inroads in our hearts.

It is hard to carry around the guilt that our day doesn’t look as exciting as another family’s day.

That clear cut line, in that your child knows your expectations, allows them to work on their positive attitude while you decide where you can make improvement.

While I am sharing secrets, did I tell you that my lapbooks and unit studies were born out of my desire to be a better teacher?

I use to think lapbooks where for only young children. I set a bar for myself, like I do for my sons and wanted my teaching and activities to be something that draws my sons to learning.

Sharing my unit studies and lapbooks allowed me to not only set a standard for the type of teacher I wanted to be but it also shoved deep down that tyrannical mother I could be when it came to learning.

I have learned to let go of the fact that it’s not my fault that some days are just well – routine.

Life and school are very similar because life is more about routine than life altering moments.

I have learned that from routine comes the tiny moments I cherish in homeschooling.

Teaching my sons to value routine was also the start of changing their attitude about learning when most people may think that routine is boring.

Establish a routine. 

We all have interruptions in our school.

It can be hard to break the habit of letting things that are nonessential take over our day and break our routine.

I feel all homeschoolers crave routine even though sometimes we don’t recognize our natural desire to have a flow to day that we can predict.

Following our body’s natural rhythm to sleep, eat and move around, we have that same desire to learn and be educated.

When my sons know what to expect each day and don’t wander around aimlessly asking what we are going to do each day, it makes for calm in my home.

Post a visual homeschool schedule if your children are young or post a class schedule in their notebooks if your children are older.

Help them to get started on time by not having so much chaos in the house that it is distracting to their routine.

I still find everything fascinating about learning but more importantly I find happiness in being passionate about teaching my sons.

Enthusiasm is contagious and it starts with you, not them.

It doesn’t mean we don’t require a positive attitude when our children show up for learning, but it means we model the type of adults we want our children to eventually be.

Weaved into that attitude is the reason we are excited about showing up each day to homeschool.

I don’t believe the only reason we should be eager learners is to get a good paying job or to go to college but for the gift of curiosity.
Curiosity has sticking power unlike any career or any college degree.

I have also  learned that it is my job to try to make each day a little better than the next day.
Because I can’t sing, dance or draw my sons will have to accept I will do my best to teach and I will accept that they will do their best to show up for days that are just ordinary.

How about you? Are most of your days just ordinary?

Hugs and love ya,

Check out these other tips!

How To Fake Homeschooling

Biggest Challenges to Homeschooling

Easy Ways to Break Out of a Homeschool Rut

Helping our Homeschool Children Find their Inner Drive When We are Not Sure We Have It

Eliminating 3 Non-Essentials in Homeschooling

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This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

With our move to South America, I had two suitcases to pack with what was absolutely essential to living in South America.  Included in our two suitcase maximum for each person was not just clothes, but homeschooling books.

Non-Essentials In Homeschooling

Eliminating non-essentials was utterly crucial to making a smooth transition.  The line between absolutely vital and unimportant became very clear.

Homeschooling is similar because there are just some things that are not required to raising life long learners.  Instead of a homeschooling help, some things can become a hindrance.

Look at these Tips to Eliminating 3 Non-Essentials in Homeschooling.

Assigning a Book Report – Non-Essential.  I did it too.  I assigned my boys books reports in the beginning of my homeschool journey only because that is what I did in public school. 

Like most new homeschooling teachers I associated books reports with good readers and writers. 

The longer I homeschooled, the more I realized that my strategies like reading aloud, practicing writing each day, acting out stories, creating puppets with the boys when they were preschool age and debating an author’s viewpoint in the high school grades was incredibly more powerful.

It has been my experience that forced book reports do not fuel the love for reading and especially with wiggly boys.

Also, I learned that if I just had to assign one for the language arts teacher inside of me then assign a book my kids don’t like. Who really wants to be forced to use literary analysis on a book they love?

Instilling the pleasure of reading or lingering over vocabulary for the love of words has to be cultivated with other equally pleasurable tasks.

When you are doing copywork with your children, talking orally about the plot or rising action of a book or researching about an author, information in a book is then absorbed and retained.

More important reading is associated with pleasure and not drudgery.

College Degree – Non-Essential.  As you homeschool longer, you realize that all that is needed is the ability to learn alongside your children.

Here is a little secret I learned while conducting my homeschooling workshops. 

Quite a few of the public school teachers in my workshop didn’t want the other moms in the workshop to know they were teachers. 

Of course, I was elated and enthusiastic to have quite a few public school teachers in my workshops because I savored our time together as we shared teaching tips.

However, many (not all) of the public school teachers turned homeschool educator felt that their college education hampered their ability to think outside the box. 

Appreciating their candor and vulnerability, I realized we all struggle with things that make us feel inadequate.

A parent’s degree or lack of it has very little bearing on the success of their journey.

Check out the article The Myth of Teacher Qualifications by HSLDA.

Knowing All the Answers – Non-Essential. We may think we need to know all the answers, but when I have been honest with my boys by letting them know that I don’t know all the answers, they appreciate that I am human too.

What I have found is that knowing where to go to find the answers or how to connect with other homeschoolers has been more essential.

Too, a dogged determination, willingness to work hard and an unwavering dedication to your children's education have been the keys to successfully homeschooling.

Eliminating the clutter as I packed and weighed each bag carefully for our move, though stressful at the time, allowed more room for what was really important.

Only so much will fit in a bag and only so much will fit into a homeschool day.

Looking back now, unloading all that clutter and eliminating the non-essentials has allowed me to maximize the time we have together by savoring what we brought with us.

You'll love my other tried and true tips through they 20+ years I've homeschooled.

What about you? Have you overstuffed your day with non-essentials?

Hugs and love ya,

Patience, Confidence, Knowing all the Answers – NOT Required to Homeschool

3 Homeschooling Myths Debunked

Things Homeschoolers Know