Seven homeschoool lies I want to tell my younger self remind me of how homeschooling is not always easy.
Homeschool Lies
Having the courage to chase away secret homeschool fears is not easy to do when you’re a new homeschooler.
You’re worried about doing everything right; I was no different when I was new to homeschooling.
Fear was one of the biggest obstacles to overcoming homeschooling. If I could turn back time, I would share these 7 homeschool lies to my younger self.
When the Biggest Obstacle to Overcoming Homeschooling is YOU
ONE/ “Tina, don’t fall for it a bit. Your three year old won’t be behind by the time you get to high school.”
Focusing less on what if my children are going to get behind instead of delighting where they were at would have helped me to teach and savor the here and now moment.
TWO/ “Tina, girl, you know you love Star Wars, so remember what Yoda said. There is no try. Do or do not.”
Even coming from a family where my mom homeschooled my youngest sister, I wished my thinking was less of I’m going to try it for a year and more of what an important life changing decision my family had made.
If I had viewed beginning to homeschool like my commitment to having a child, being a new mom, having a new marriage or making big move to a place where you can’t go back, I would have stressed less.
Realizing more time should have been spent on making homeschool a lifestyle change would have been a better use of my time.
THREE/ “Tina, why didn’t you let the boys watch TV more even when school was finished?”
Instead of focusing on extreme rules for our house like not having a tv and no video games, I should have worked more on finding a balance instead of creating extreme schedules for my little kids.
Realizing that some homeschoolers don’t have a tv in their home by choice is good for their family but not ours.
My family likes tv, video games, and techie play things. A balance would have been so much better for us.
FOUR/ “Why didn’t you go out during school hours, Tina? What were you afraid of?
I wished I would have changed my school schedule earlier than I did instead of thinking that during the day I couldn’t go out because it was school hours.
Little did I know that even though I lived in Bodunk, U.S.A., homeschoolers are oozing by the thousands.
Most people have heard of it before. I was the new one, not homeschooling.
FIVE/ “Girl, you’re stressing way too much by prepping Mr. Senior 2013 for visits by grandma. Why do you feel the need to prove to others that you are exactly what your sons need when it comes to teaching them?”
I wished I would have worried less about proving my homeschool success to my in-laws, outlaws, and any other family relationship that I may not have wanted to claim kinship to and focused more on the how-tos of teaching.
SIX/ “Leave the house Tina. It’s okay. Learning is not just taking place within the four walls of your school room. You can actually skip lessons plans. Throw them away if you need to.”
Understanding that field trips, homeschool conventions and open houses are not always in my back yard or even my side of the county, I would have attended more conventions, open houses and gatherings for homeschoolers.
SEVEN/ “Don’t worry about all that homeschool curriculum you’re buying. You’ll be an expert before you know it and if you need it while you’re learning how to teach, then use it. Don’t worry when other people tell you that you won’t use all that curriculum.”
I wished I would have found this quote about the piles of curriculum I had bought and may not get to in a lifetime by Sally Clarkson out of her book Educating the WholeHearted Child, “It is nearly a rite of passage for new homeschooling families to buy curricula that ends up gathering dust on the shelf. Usually, it turns out to require more preparation and involvement than they are willing to invest, or it doesn’t fit their lifestyle. It becomes an investment in experience.What we all learn, though, is that any curriculum is only a tool — it doesn’t really “teach” anything. The attitude and commitment of the teacher is far more important than the tool. So if it doesn’t work, don’t worry. Put your unused used curriculum on the table with everyone else’s and buy real books next time. You’re experienced now.“
Beginning to homeschool doesn’t mean you have to give up the educational tools you learned in public school.
Through the years Tina, I’ve learned that changing my expectations opens the way for a whole new way to learn and that is powerful! THAT is how you grow.
Homeschool fearlessly Tina and rock on!
(Psst, from my struggle I wrote a book for YOU)
Also, Tina look over these posts and gently remind yourself today:
- From Struggling Homeschooler to Empowered Educator
- 31 Day Free Homeschool Boot Camp for New Homeschoolers
- How to Cope Successfully With Homeschool Mental Stress
- First Time Homeschool Mom: Am I Doing This Right?
- 65 Best Teaching Tips for Embracing Homeschooling Multiple Ages and Ideas You Wished You Knew Earlier
- Is Homeschooling Right for Your Family? Hear From the Kids!
- How to Mesh Your Personality With Homeschooling When They Collide
- How To Start Homeschooling the Easy No Stress Way (Maybe)
- What to Expect When You Expect to Homeschool (25 Silliest Questions Ever)
Hugs and love ya,
When people start out homeschooling, they feel like they have to prove to everyone how smart their kids are. But we don’t have to prove anything. I’ve recognized that after homeschooling for more than a dozen years, that the newer homeschoolers are stressed out too much trying to prove themselves.
Susan Evans recently posted…Elementary Physics Series
Well said Susan. That is why I love your blog, you show how much fun and rigorous homeschool can be.
It’s hard for new bees because not everyone feels so confident, but I agree who are you trying to prove it to?
YES! So many of these ring true for, especially #3. Balance is a key word with my video game loving son. We have certain tasks and activities we would like him to fulfill to help him live a more well rounded life, and after that the games are fair game. I get so frustrated with a local group of ours that stress, obsesses, and shames for screen time!
Love your comment Heidi and your blog. It shows how we can use those things in our homeschool.
I hate when groups say that and I think maybe their inexperience shows through because kids learn through many modalities and we need to use them all.
Sigh, I was too severe but we are making up for it now. lol
In my years of experience as a homeschool mom, I both agree and disagree with point 3. I really do think discipline is important for activities such as TV, educational or not. Video games, tv, etc are fun in moderation. But I have seen so many families where that becomes what their kids do all the time. Personally, I don’t think its healthy to spend all of one’s free time around a TV or computer screen. I’m not saying yours spend all their free time around a screen… but I’ve seen families where that has happened.
I absolutely agree that balance is key, that’s one of the first things I bring up when I do consulting.
Enjoyed your comment and so agree with you about it being unhealthy. Absolutely!!
However, in writing this, I didn’t need to more severe than I was. We were and are very disciplined and I have always had to work on finding the opposite or balance.
Extreme and severe is not a fun place to homeschool. Every mom is different and though I’m glad I erred on the side of caution, it was just too much for us.
I run my house (lol) and my kids don’t when it comes to their free time, so I could have eased up some. It was a gentle reminder to those that have set very severe standards.
Balance is key for sure. Thanks for the reminder and great to have you here.