My wedding ring was frozen in an ice cube and the ice cube was floating in a glass of champagne when the Mr. proposed to me. And then there were the soft petals of my favorite rose strewn all over the walk way and into our room.
I have so many fond memories of my honeymoon, but quickly realized after marriage that a successful marriage requires a lot of hard work.
A Fresh Start in Homeschool?
It could not be one prolonged honeymoon.
Doing laundry, making a living, cooking meals, setting up a budget, questions like how to raise children that would come along and where we would live were decisions that as partners we had to make.
The scope of the work that was now involved was not easy, no matter how much I prepared my mind and heart.
Truly, the honeymoon was over.
Homeschooling is similar in a lot of ways.
We may have had some romantic notions that everything would work out and nothing would go wrong.
Too, we may not have realized the amount of work that is involved in homeschooling.
Perhaps we thought we would pick up where public school left off, but realize now we have to go over information that should have been previously mastered.
When a new bee begins to homeschool, I often think about the period of a couple’s honeymoon.
Before marriage, we can so conveniently overlook the faults of our mates. Whatever bad traits our mates have though can’t be hidden during the honeymoon period.
Though I do feel homeschooling is a perfect solution for the majority of families and there are no hidden faults, there are ones we create or foster because of our lack of experience.
For example, about three months or so into homeschooling, a new homeschooler may now start to question the choice to homeschool or the curriculum that she is using.
How to Go From Thinking to Doing
We may not be as in love with the idea of homeschooling because the day to day grind of reality sets in.
What can be done?
Like a marriage, homeschooling should not be based on idealistic infatuations but on genuine love, caring, devotion and facts.
Loyalty too is a virtue that is missing in so many marriages.
It mean sticking to something even in the face of tough times. Instead of looking at the negative attitudes your children may have developed while away from you, focus on what you want from your children.
Are you loyal to your children and the decision to homeschool?
Do not allow whatever disappointments you may have now in your family or children to keep you from going forward in what you desire your family to be. Work at it. Who is afraid of hard work anyway?
If you need to go back over some material not previously understood by your child, then that is where you are. Begin there and go forward.
Realize too that not every decision you made in the beginning when you started was a bad one also helps to maintain balance.
For example, if you feel like it’s your curricula that is not working out, give it another month instead of pitching that curricula and starting another. Check out Stop Switching Your Curriculum, Switch Your Course of Study.
Don’t start your journey off curriculum hopping. It’s hard to get off that path once you start down it.
It takes at least 3 months to know whether or not a curriculum is working. Remember, it could be something else that is not working right like a schedule or lack of teacher experience.
Give it time and reflect on what brought you to homeschooling.
The same blessings you want to receive are still there. They have to be accomplished with hard work now and not a drawn out honeymoon period.
Time is a precious commodity no matter the age of our child.
It requires time to have a friendship with our children if they are teenagers.
If they are younger, our time is needed to teach them to read, how to hold a pencil and how to pick up after themselves. How your child best learns and processes information may now be more clear to you.
Comparing and contrasting homeschooling approaches like Classical, Unit Studies, Charlotte Mason and Unschooling is enough to make the head spin of any new homeschooling parent. Check out my articles on understanding the different homeschool approaches.
It all requires tedious work and time but successfully homeschooling IS a reachable goal.
Homeschooling, like a well established and loving marriage is built upon every tiny act of love and kindness.
I am glad that my honeymoon has been over for many, many years. Then, I could see the precious beauty of my husband’s inner person and the one very vital element to both a good marriage and successfully homeschooling – commitment!
You can do it!
Hugs and you know I love ya,
I liked your article but I was having a hard time reading certain parts (choppy a little). I laughed at the curriculum hopping because I do that a little. Not throughout one year but I was trying to work out what was best for my family for each year. I have learned how to have a backbone curriculum but jump of it if needed to help me family in different ways, and also that my kids glean from each others studies, so even if they are studying different things, they are learning alongside each other. It is so interesting to watch! I guess that goes with almost doing it for 7 years. I actually liked a lot of what we did at different times and I can tell what my kids gleaned from, so this upcoming year is going to be interesting (especially with a new little one coming!).
Hi Elizabeth,
Thank you for letting me know about the word left out.
It happens when blogging and no matter how hard you try and when you have lots of content, it is bound to happen. I still don’t like it though. I added in the word I left out.
Thank you for sharing your experience.
We are in our second year of homeschooling, Preschool last year and Kindergarten this year, thank you for the encouragement to stay the course when its bound to get sticky later on! Because I’m sure it will down the road!
Visiting from Mom 2 Mom Link-up! Have a great day!
Anastasia recently posted…What Can We Learn From Jonah?
So welcome Anastasia.
Yes, some years you will be just glad they passed!lol Thanks for visiting from the link up.
Hello! As a first time homeschooling mom this year I was so incredibly blessed by this article! I am pinning it to remind me on the tough days why God has called me to teach my children. I also have chosen to not curriculum hop and I love that perspective. There are many choices but on those tough days I will look at me and not my curriculum. Thank you so much for sharing your heart!
Awww, so sweet Christine. Your sweet comment made my day.
Yes, you are MORE than equipped. Just don’t fret when faced with fear – FOCUS on what you need.
Too, it’s the change in our lifestyle instead of the curriculum normally.
Just remember to SKIP lessons when they are STUPID and YES some will be and focus on training a child not teaching a curriculum.