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Homeschool Confession – My Homeschool Mistakes

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Homeschool confession my homeschool mistakes. Besides mistakes are part of learning how to homeschool. Do you want to hear about some of my blunders?

Homeschool mistakes are part of learning not what to do when homeschooling. However, in the beginning it’s hard to view it that way.

Too, nobody wants to do the trial and error method with their kids.

We have a few short years to homeschool our kids and we want to maximize our efforts.

Homeschool Confession - My Homeschool Mistakes

If I share just three of my mistakes maybe they can save you some grief.

Not leaving the public school mentality.

Isn’t that hard to do? Especially because I was the product of public school.

For example, I never questioned why I needed to test, I just blindly followed the masses.

I realized that leaving the public school mentality didn’t mean not using some of the practical tips that did work in public school at home. 

It just meant to leave behind what I didn’t need because I was not teaching my kids, not a classroom.

New Homeschooler

Because we live in this world, it’s hard to not be affected by the pressure of test, perform and out do.

My sons are just normal boys who have been privately tutored by me. That’s all.

I left public school because I didn’t want to model it at home, not just change geography.

Comparison to other homeschool moms, dad and oh yes their children.

I am guilty. It seemed like some other mom had this whole homeschool thing figured out.

Then I find out later her beginnings were as humble as mine.

I thought other dads did more of the teaching until I realized that statistics show that about 85% or more of the teaching is shouldered by the mother.

I guess it just sounded good when dad did a science experiment with their sons. My science experiments were not that exciting in the beginning. Can you say boring teacher?

Boring and now a show off. Yes, I thought I had to “show off” my progress to my mother-in-law who was not supportive of our decision to homeschool in the beginning.

I had to prove her wrong and was humbled in a lesson I won’t forget.

Trying to show off my teaching skills to her, I asked Mr. Senior 2013 who I was then teaching to read to show us the long i sound. Yes he did.

He promptly went and got the longest piece of white butcher paper he could tear off the roll.

Laying the paper down on the floor, which was twice as long as grandma, my poor baby proceeded to draw the longest i I had ever seen.  I shuffled off in shame.

What to Expect from the Homeschool Kickstarter

From my struggle, I created a curriculum for new homeschool educators. And taught this course in person to new homeschoolers. I’ve now put my course online for all new homeschoolers

More shamed at the fact that I was trying to show off instead of what really was funny at the time though I didn’t feel that way.

Humble me for I needed it for the road ahead.

With the 6 modules and 29 workshops, I walk you step-by-step through beginning homeschooling, understanding the homeschool lifestyle, choosing curriculum, and understanding how to fit it all in a day.

Look at what you’ll learn.

  • Learn how to identify what is and what is not homeschooling. It can mean the difference in succeeding or succumbing to the mindset you want to leave behind.
  • Choose curriculum wisely instead of using the oh it looks good method.
  • Organize the areas of life that collide when you begin to homeschool.
  • Identify and create the right schedule for your family’s rhythm.
  • Understand what is important to teach from K to High School. (Oh, did I tell you I have kids well past 10 years old?)
Not investing more time in my education as a teacher.

Like many new homeschoolers, I too focused solely on my children and their need for a support group, curriculum, socialization and field trip.

It took me a few years before I realized that the best way to help my children was to become the best teacher I could be.

A public school teacher is required to take continuing education classes. Why shouldn’t I?

If I didn’t take time to read blogs, join support groups, buy teacher helps and attend homeschool conventions I couldn’t say I was schooling for my children.

Feelings of guilt that I had associated with longing to interact with other homeschool moms had to be left behind.

Association has to be a vital part of my everyday teaching. Online forum groups were not a waste of time but needed for refreshment and encouragement.

New to Homeschool

Like all things, the time I took for educating myself and camaraderie had to have a place in my life to be balanced.

Your turn: Do you have a story we can learn from? I hope you can learn from my mistakes.

Homeschool Confession - My Homeschool Mistakes

I thought about this quote today because after many repeated failures, pursuit can turn to passion for homeschooling.

“Life is filled with so many exciting twists and turns. Hop off the straight and narrow whenever you can and take the winding paths.

Experience the exhilaration of the view from the edge. Because the moments spent there, that take your breath away, are what make you feel truly alive.”

~ Stacey Charter ~

You’ll also love these reads for New Homeschoolers:

Homeschool Confession - My Homeschool Mistakes @ Tina's Dynamic Homeschool Plus

Deschool – Get off the Public School Treadmill!

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This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

Deschool get off the public school treadmill is about freedom. Also, you’ll love more tips on my page The Dynamics of How to Homeschool Easily and Smarter.

When teaching my new homeschooler workshops in person, I tried to use the term deschool right away so that new homeschoolers or those that are thinking about homeschooling have time to wrap their mind around the concept.

Though there are many facets about deschooling that you will want to embrace over the course of your journey, I want to put it down in layman’s terms for the new homeschoolers.

Deschool - Get Off the Public School Treadmill @ Tina's Dynamic Homeschool Plus

Running and burning energy but not really traveling anywhere is what it is like to be on a treadmill.

Are Deschooling and Unschooling Two Very Different Terms

Deschooling is about getting off that public school treadmill and transitioning to a new life.

For some homeschoolers it may include some rest time.

For others it may be defining what their family educational goals are.

Each family will have different goals during their deschooling period.

Have you ever done a toxin cleanse?  I love the feeling afterwards because I have a new pep in my step.

Deschooling is a period of time to shove back from rigid thinking and adjust the pep in your step to a new way of life.

That is how some homeschoolers define this time period.

More Resources for Why My Kids Are Homeschooled

This time period allows you to re-train your mind and body and to make drastic life changes.

You want to make changes that will be permanent and to start fresh and motivated.

Letting go of preconceived ideas and notions of what education is suppose to look like and defining what you want your children to learn is what deschooling is about too.

It is a time to adopt your definition of education, to discover that you may want to be more self-educated than to be handed curricula, to join home school support groups, to meet and incorporate new homeschooling friends into your lives and the ability and power to say no to labels.

Say NO to Uniform Standards Set for the Masses

Furthermore, it could include saying no to standards by the state.

Why spend so much time trying to figure out where your child is SUPPOSE to be and what other children his age are doing? 

Forget what everybody else is doing.

Spend your time and energy focusing on where your child is NOW and move forward!

Deschooling is knowing that we have homeschool freedom but it’s also utilizing that freedom to suit our family.

Some think deschooling means doing nothing. It might for some. 

And we don’t want to be critical of those families who may need physical rest now.

The rigors of getting up early to catch a bus, having long school days complicated with an enormous amount of homework is physically draining. 

The truth of it is that we really don’t know what another homeschool family has been through.

For all of us it does mean transitioning to a new lifestyle.

Think about huge transitions in your life up until this point. 

When we transition to a different lifestyle whether that significant change was having a baby or switching careers, our schedules changed.

We allowed ourselves time to adjust to a new schedule and we let go of ideas and goals that at the time seem realistic.

We now see that some of our ideas may have been idealistic.

It is quite common for even seasoned veterans to not have taken a period of deschooling and they may be headed down burnout road.

The Power of REST

Deschooling can be a period of few week to a few months depending on the level of stress your family experienced.

Take time to deschool and get off the public school treadmill.

One of the very best books to bring reality back to our lives, renew your passion for homeschooling or just to propel you forward on the road to homeschooling is Deschooling Gently.

Not only is it a great read, but the encouragement you receive from it will last years.

Have you let go? How is your deschooling coming? What activities and goals are you including to deschool?

How can I be sure I cover EVERYTHING this year?

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This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

When I hear the question how can I be sure I cover EVERYTHING this year, my mind flashes back to my many years of homeschooling when I too felt the same way.

Teaching EVERYTHING In Your Homeschool

One point I stress is to be balanced in your teaching. This is important because it gives you a changed direction to your efforts.

Switch your direction from checking off a list of subjects for the day to intentionally teaching educational independence.

Instead of focusing on EVERYTHING,  focus on the skills your children need to have so they can learn ANYTHING.

This is a completely different concept from the way most kids have been taught up to the time you begin homeschooling.

How can I be sure I cover EVERYTHING this year?

Teach your children to be independent instead of daily spoon feeding.

We already do it if you think about it.

For example, the other day Tiny tried to ask me a question, which he should have known. 

Instead of looking up what a word meant, he wanted me to simply tell him the answer.

Each situation is different and at times, I do explain what a word means.

But as the teacher, I also knew what kind of effort he had been putting forth in writing his composition for the day.

He was in a get it over with mood because his mind was more interested in the games he could play later after school.

Instant Education – Do Our Children Pay the Price?

Teaching him to value his independent learning time and also because I knew the meaning of the word would stick, I required him to look up the word.

Yes, it would have been easier for me to give him the answer so that he could finish with his composition and move on to the next subject, but in the process I would not be teaching him everything.

It is not even realistic nor a trait of modesty to think we will teach our children everything.

When our eagerness turns to anxiety, it can have a devastating affect on our children.

Personally, I never thought that pushing EVERYTHING onto my children as being a lack of modesty on my part because I certainly did not know everything.

What was I teaching my children? That we could read a few books and be an expert in that subject? Certainly not.

Also, my pushing an everything education at them might be depriving my children of a childhood because I expected instant performance.

The public educational system is in a hurry to label our children as behind, ahead, gifted or whatever new politically correct term that will arrive in the future.

Skills our children will need are ones that will last a life time like reading, math, research skills. and technical know-how in this modern age.

Too, whenever did life skills and plain practical sense like opening a bank account, trying to live a debt free life, running a household, making good decisions as the head of a household ever be counted as less important?

Are we raising dependent or educated independent children?

Harmonious Homeschool

Do you know that some children do not know how to use a library let alone research resource materials?

Equipping our children to weigh valuable resources found on the internet versus valueless ones is vital today.

With the amount of information overload we have access to, kids need to know the difference.

Children’s dictionaries, student dictionaries, rhyming dictionaries, thesauri, encyclopedias and atlases are resources that are priceless as we teach our children a lifelong love of learning.

Too we want resources that give us an idea of basic subjects because we don’t want to compromise our rigorous standards.

The most basic subjects are arithmetic, language arts, history and science.

Public schools nowadays cut back on subjects that also enrich our lives.

Enrichment, the very thing that causes children to accelerate in their education is the first thing stripped from it.

In homeschooling, we can add art, foreign language, drama, PE, dance, 4H and sports.

All of these subjects help to round out our children but more important they instill an appetite for learning everything that is not easily quenched.

Curriculum, course of studies, and checklists are just guides, but they don’t take importance over the goals we have set for our family.

Therein lies the secret to equipping our children with everything they need to know.

When looking back now, it’s liberating to know that teaching children how to learn everything they want to know is easier than I even imagined.

Self-Education. Expert or Novice Status

The key was to give them the freedom to explore what interests them and then give them keys to self-education.

There are those that will always scoff at the ideas of self-education thinking and that we only cover broad strokes.

It has been my experience that a scholar can be born from a slacker and infused to knowing everything about the details of any subject he deems worth to cover.

So next time someone asks you how are you going to teach EVERYTHING, let them know you don’t have to.

How can I be sure I cover EVERYTHING this year?

We don’t know everything. You are leading them to teach themselves ANYTHING they want to know.

Beside, we were made to learn lifelong and not in just the short few years our children reach high school and graduate.

How do you answer those who ask you about homeschooling gaps?

Look at these other helps and tips:

Hugs and love ya,

Signature T
How Can I Be Sure I Cover EVERYTHING This Year @ Tina's Dynamic Homeschool Plus

When You Feel Like a Homeschool Failure

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This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

Admitting homeschool failure is not easy. Homeschooling has always been the right choice for our family although many years I wasn’t sure if I was the right teacher for the job.

When You Feel Like a Homeschool Failure

When you feel like a homeschool failure as a teacher, it can be a pretty gray period because you feel like you have really messed up your children.

I was a contributing factor for Mr. Senior 2013 getting behind in math.

Yep I did, I messed him up. First, let me tell what I did and then tell you what I learned.

Homeschool Failure or Wrong Ways to Homeschool?

We had been using Math U See and I didn’t think he was absorbing the formulas as well as I thought he should; I switched him to Teaching Textbooks right before high school.

Shortly after we started using it during high school, I realized that Teaching Textbooks put him behind and that he was actually ahead of where I thought he was. 

So we switched back to Math U See.

Can I just tell you how bad I felt?

Although I had been homeschooling for a while, I still didn’t recognize that Mr. Senior 2013 was just at a plateau and that some of the concepts he would soon understand.

Look at some of these tips that helped me to sort through the feelings of failure I had and get us back on track.

What if they are not just getting it? 

This is a tough one because each child is different and many factors affect whether or not your child is understanding a certain subject or curriculum.

Looking back now, I should have backed up to the point where Mr. Senior 2013 understood the curriculum and isolate the math concept instead of right thinking it was the total curriculum.

When I did this later on after I made the switch of course, I realized he was getting most of Math U See, but had only reached some upper level math that required a bit more time to understand.

Questioning Your Homeschool

I knew Mr. Senior’s 2013 ability to work at higher levels and instead of accepting his difficulties as part of his development, I thought he needed to keep sprinting forward. Pushing was the mistake on my part.

I knew Mr. Senior 2013 excelled at math and did not need constant repetition.

Instead of trusting his learning style, I was afraid that I was going to hold him back and in the process I did.

What I am trying to say is that his learning style was not going to change over night and I should have looked at other things that affected him instead of just the curriculum.

What do I feel like we are going backwards? That was another question I had to ask myself.

I had to analyze everything we were doing. Was I not spending enough time with him because the younger boys were tugging at my time?

Was his schedule too full?

Knowing that Mr. Senior 2013 flourished with routine, was I allowing too many outside activities to interfere with our routine.  These were all questions I had to go back and answer.

As I have learned now, one solution would have been to take off a month and do review and go back over previous mastered material.

I could have easily grabbed one of those inexpensive work texts and just let him sat at his comfortable level for a bit until the frustration passed.

It was hard for me to come up with that solution because math is one of his best subjects.

I just didn’t realize then that my kids would even need to step back in subjects they excelled in.

Last thing I wanted to do was to bore him with previous mastered material.

That was just the thing he needed as he was going through a period of physical growth.

School had to to take a second seat to allow time for his physical and emotional development.

Is the problem in just one subject? This is another tell-tale sign of how I knew it was developmental.

When we had problems before, it was normally one subject and that is a clue that maybe I needed to switch out that one curriculum.

Other things were going on in my son’s life that helped me to see that the curriculum was not the culprit.

He pretty much struggled with the everyday basics of doing school.

I didn’t take this lightly because this was my kid who was such a joy to teach because he loved routine and didn’t have to be told to start school.

Again, it’s easier to look back now. At the time I felt like I pretty much was failing my child because I didn’t have the luxury of looking forward.

Mr. Senior 2013 was going through changes when I did a honest self-evaluation.

He was getting real mouthy, disagreeing pretty much with everything I said, started looking for a job and expressed his concern about supporting himself.

I finally understood that when I felt like a homeschool failure that my son needed me more than ever. Not all failures are a “curriculum thing”.

He couldn’t figure out what was wrong with our homeschooling because of his inexperience. 

I needed to step up and help us sort through it without my son feeling like I was going to send him to public school or throw in the towel either one.

Instead of feeling like a homeschool failure, I realized the time was closing in on how much time I would have with Mr. Senior 2013.

Mistake I Will Never Make Again

I focused on the satisfaction of knowing that his changes in puberty was a part of his life that I was proud to be part of as me and my husband guided him along.

When You Feel Like a Homeschool Failure

Experiences like feeling like a homeschool failure build a deep down resolve and dogged determination to keep on homeschooling when you come through them and can finally pinpoint the problem.

Update 2020: As I write this, my three kids have graduated and are now adults. I’m mentoring a preschooler.

All the tears, all the worry, all the stress pales into comparison to how well-rounded and successful each of my kids are. What I’ve learned is that teaching my kids about defeat, how to get up, and move on have been of way more value in their every day life than being behind.

I’ve learned it was IMPOSSIBLE to teach everything, but I taught them how to research everything they wanted to know. When they have perceived gaps now as adults, they are not intimidated. I can’t hold back my happy tears.

Moms, you GOT THIS!

Look at these other tips about how to find solutions when you feel like nothing is working.

What about you? Does this resonate with you?

Hug and love ya,

Tina 2015 Signature
When You Feel Like a Homeschool Failure @ Tina's Dynamic Homeschool Plus

Cultivating the Desire to Homeschool

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This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

You’ve probably come across the type before. Those homeschoolers that knew always that they were going to homeschool and they knew before their first child was conceived.

However, if you are one of those that just fell into homeschooling or came to it kicking and screaming, then cultivating the desire to homeschool has probably been a learned art for you.

Whether you always had the desire to homeschool or hopped on board later, we all need to rekindle and cultivate the desire to homeschool so we can foster our growth.

Let’s just face it too, the world we live in today doesn’t engender finding tranquil moments in our day to ponder our desire to homeschool and fill up our reserve.

On the other hand, each day that we homeschool can empty us of our eagerness to keep on homeschooling.

It’s essential to maintaining the pace of homeschooling to tap into homeschool resources that will stir you to action and to avoid certain mind-sets.

Avoid the Weight of Burdensome Negativity.  Sometimes we are our own worst enemies because we have a set standard unreachably high for either us or our children.

For example, do you need to adjust the time that you begin school so that you have time to get more house chores done, or just to soak up more time in the morning to wake up?

Between me and you, I had several days early in my journey where I missed taking a shower and skipped breakfast because my schedule said it was time to start. Why do we do that to ourselves?

I never did get any homeschooling mom of the year trophy award either.

What I did learn was that day in and day out schooling at a grueling pace only sets a homeschooler up for burn out.

The end of the journey is all that matters. Mr. Senior 2013 remembers more about the quiet moments we had at home together doing simple things like reading aloud and playing board games than he did large homeschool projects where we were all stressed out.

Maybe you feel your child is not progressing as fast some other homeschool children that you know.

Could your child be at a learning plateau or is he getting enough rest and exercise?  Look at The Dos and Don’ts When You Hit A Learning Plateau in Homeschooling.

Change Your Homeschool Approach.  I changed my homeschool approach three times until I found one that suited my children and my teaching style.

When we are fighting a switch to a new homeschool approach, it can have devastating effects on our desire to continue homeschooling.

Look at Stop Switching Your Curriculum, Switch Your Course of Study.  I use to think if only I can change my teaching methods at the end of the year that it would be less stressful.

What I finally realized was that like a parched and sun scorched plant that is drying up and shriveling, my children’s love of learning was the same way.

I needed to take quick action to inject a love of learning by changing either my approach, curriculum or schedule.

Just Can’t Avoid it – You Need Other Homeschoolers. Before I formed our co-op and field trip group, I use to think I was too busy to be meeting with other homeschoolers.  Ask me now about how I feel and I cringe about my thinking then because homeschooling and meeting with other homeschoolers are inextricably linked to homeschooling staying power.

When you are tired with several small children, it’s hard to see how fellowship with people you barely know will help you. It just seems like one more energy zapping exercise.

And to make matters worse, if your personality is like mine where you are perfectly happy with just your inner circle of friends, it can be hard to overcome the thinking that you are just fine.

But what I have learned is that the homeschooling spirit is contagious when you have a crowd around.  Instead of draining your time of one more lack luster thing to do, interacting and sharing tips, techniques, and venting about the the ups and downs of homeschooling with other homeschooling families bolsters our desire to keep on homeschooling.

Not only are we encouraged to keep on homeschooling, but we meet other families who have similar circumstances as our own.

Some of the most significant homeschooling changes that I have had the conviction to do came directly after mingling with experienced homeschool moms.

Stoke the embers of homeschooling by fueling the desire to homeschool through being consistent each day and being quick to take advantage of opportunities to be encouraged by other homeschoolers.

The end will be here before you know it.

Hugs and love ya,

Signature T

To go from exhausted to exhilarated, look at these posts:

The 3 R’s for Homeschoolers. Part 3

5 Ideas to Kick-Start Your New Homeschool Year By Including Others

Easy Ways to Break Out of a Homeschool Rut

Have You Learned the Secret to Homeschool Joy?

Look at some of these homeschooling books that will stir you to action!