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Begin Homeschooling

When the Homeschooling Honeymoon is Over

August 5, 2015 | 6 Comments
This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

My wedding ring was frozen in an ice cube and the ice cube was floating in a glass of champagne when the Mr. proposed to me.  And then there were the soft petals of my favorite rose strewn all over the walk way and into our room.

I have so many fond memories of my honeymoon, but quickly realized after marriage that a successful marriage requires a lot of hard work.

A Fresh Start in Homeschool?

It could not be one prolonged honeymoon.

Doing laundry, making a living, cooking meals, setting up a budget, questions like how to raise children that would come along and where we would live were decisions that as partners we had to make.

The scope of the work that was now involved was not easy, no matter how much I prepared my mind and heart.

Truly, the honeymoon was over.

When the Homeschooling Honeymoon Is Over @ Tina's Dynamic Homeschool Plus

Homeschooling is similar in a lot of ways.

We may have had some romantic notions that everything would work out and nothing would go wrong.

Too, we may not have realized the amount of work that is involved in homeschooling.

Perhaps we thought we would pick up where public school left off, but realize now we have to go over information that should have been previously mastered.

When a new bee begins to homeschool, I often think about the period of a couple’s honeymoon.

Before marriage, we can so conveniently overlook the faults of our mates. Whatever bad traits our mates have though can’t be hidden during the honeymoon period.

Though I do feel homeschooling is a perfect solution for the majority of families and there are no hidden faults, there are ones we create or foster because of our lack of experience.

For example, about three months or so into homeschooling, a new homeschooler may now start to question the choice to homeschool or the curriculum that she is using.

How to Go From Thinking to Doing

We may not be as in love with the idea of homeschooling because the day to day grind of reality sets in.

What can be done?

Like a marriage, homeschooling should not be based on idealistic infatuations but on genuine love, caring, devotion and facts.

Loyalty too is a virtue that is missing in so many marriages.

It mean sticking to something even in the face of tough times. Instead of looking at the negative attitudes your children may have developed while away from you, focus on what you want from your children.

Are you loyal to your children and the decision to homeschool?

Do not allow whatever disappointments you may have now in your family or children to keep you from going forward in what you desire your family to be. Work at it. Who is afraid of hard work anyway?

If you need to go back over some material not previously understood by your child, then that is where you are. Begin there and go forward.

Realize too that not every decision you made in the beginning when you started was a bad one also helps to maintain balance.

For example, if you feel like it’s your curricula that is not working out, give it another month instead of pitching that curricula and starting another. Check out Stop Switching Your Curriculum, Switch Your Course of Study.

Don’t start your journey off curriculum hopping. It’s hard to get off that path once you start down it.

It takes at least 3 months to know whether or not a curriculum is working. Remember, it could be something else that is not working right like a schedule or lack of teacher experience.

Give it time and reflect on what brought you to homeschooling.

The same blessings you want to receive are still there. They have to be accomplished with hard work now and not a drawn out honeymoon period.

Time is a precious commodity no matter the age of our child.

It requires time to have a friendship with our children if they are teenagers.

If they are younger, our time is needed to teach them to read, how to hold a pencil and how to pick up after themselves. How your child best learns and processes information may now be more clear to you.

Comparing and contrasting homeschooling approaches like Classical, Unit Studies, Charlotte Mason and Unschooling is enough to make the head spin of any new homeschooling parent. Check out my articles on understanding the different homeschool approaches.

It all requires tedious work and time but successfully homeschooling IS a reachable goal.

Homeschooling, like a well established and loving marriage is built upon every tiny act of love and kindness.

I am glad that my honeymoon has been over for many, many years. Then, I could see the precious beauty of my husband’s inner person and the one very vital element to both a good marriage and successfully homeschooling – commitment!

You can do it!

Hugs and you know I love ya,

Tina Signature 2015c

Check Out My Top Reads for New Homeschoolers

6 CommentsFiled Under: Begin Homeschooling Tagged With: homeschool, homeschool challenges, new homeschool year, new homeschooler

Dear New Homeschooler – Are You Making this BIG Mistake? (I Was)

July 30, 2015 | 11 Comments
This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

When I first started homeschooling, it took me a long time to learn a tiny two letter word – NO.

To this day, I still ask myself if I know how to say No.

Do You Struggle to Find Time to Homeschool?

Dear New Homeschooler - Are You Making this BIG Mistake @ Tina's Dynamic Homeschool Plus

What do I try to say no to each year?

  • No to over extending myself in activities outside the home.
  • No to unrealistic expectations of myself, my husband and my children as I start off the new year.
  • No to leading more co-ops, groups or field trips than I can do.
  • No to being “the mom” that always needs to be included in hosting every baby shower and wedding shower. (This is a hard one for me because I love to plan.)
  • No to filling our schedule up with so many extracurricular activities.

Homeschooling moms by nature tend to be overachievers. What is our strength can be a potential negative if we don’t keep it in check.

Trying to right all the wrongs of public school, I did plan every minute of our day when I started homeschool.

I didn’t know how to say no to friends popping in at my house unplanned or who interrupted my homeschooling day. Quality time with my kids suffered and I had learned a valuable lesson quickly.

Finding balance was not easy because then I went to extreme lengths by isolating myself from my non-homeschooling friends.

It took another year or so before I learned to graciously just say the tiny two letter  NO and find my center.

The ability to not limit what you physically, emotionally and mentally can do in the homeschooling lifestyle could be a potential pitfall in your journey.

As new homeschoolers, who want to prove how successful they are, we aim too high or over reach by setting unrealistic expectations of what can be done in any given year.

The time will come when you will have smooth sailing and can give back to others. However, that time is not when you are new or struggling.

If we want to avoid pitfalls or traps of homeschooling busyness, we need to remember something very basic – say No.

What have you said no to this year?

Be sure to read my FREE 31 Day Boot Camp for New Homeschoolers

Grab some more courage to say NO!

  • Homeschool Confession – My Homeschool Mistakes
  • 5 Top Mistakes of New or Struggling Homeschoolers
  • The Great Homeschool Hoax – Public School at Home?
  • Why the Hectic Pace in Homeschool?
  • Should You Switch to a 4 – day Homeschool Schedule?

11 CommentsFiled Under: Begin Homeschooling Tagged With: homeschool, homeschool challenges, homeschool crisis, homeschool mistakes, new homeschooler, newbeehomeschooler

New Homeschooler – Mustering the Courage to Face THE 4 Homeschool Biggies Part 2

July 20, 2015 | 2 Comments
This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

Today, in new homeschooler – mustering the courage to face the 4 homeschool biggies part 2, I want to clue you in on two more areas that you want to take time in your first few years of homeschooling to address.

In New Homeschooler – Mustering the Courage to Face THE 4 Homeschool Biggies Part 1, I shared tips on taming the curriculum colossus and defending against the socialization hype.

Can You Really Afford to Begin Homeschooling Without Knowing This?

But the next two homeschool biggies, which I will share in a moment, are equally important to try to tame early on in your journey.

It has been my experience that when new homeschoolers hop on the curriculum roller coaster, they don’t seem to get off until they have exhausted the ride, which is normally several years down the road.

By then, they have lost valuable time in learning how to address other important areas of homeschooling, which will be of more lasting value only if they had taken time to address them earlier.

Try to balance becoming acquainted with homeschool curriculum with making time to be an organized homeschooler, which is the next homeschool biggie to tame.

3. Organized Homeschooler – Yes You Can! Organization means something different when we homeschool.

I have found that explaining what it is not helps to bring relief instead of you becoming stressed out to the point that you don’t think you can.

This way you adopt organization that fits your family and not adjust to the way somebody else does things.

One of the most encouraging sayings I have heard is by Maria Gracia of Get Organized Now when she says “organization is a decision, not a disease” and I couldn’t agree more.

Empower yourself!

Simply put, organization is communication and we all have the need to communicate. What do I mean by this?

Well, if you think about, if you want your children to begin school at a certain time, then not only orally communicate it, but set up a chart where they can see what is expected of them.

If you want your children to check mark items on a food list, which they have used up in the kitchen, then prepare a grocery list and put it in a highly visible place in the kitchen. This keeps the guesswork out of what groceries you need to buy each month.

Communicate to them by preparing a system that works for your home and makes your job as home educator much more satisfying.

If you want your children to be responsible for picking their room up and doing chores each day, communicate to them by setting up a system, like a chore chart. Communication equals organization.

Organization is not for people who have it together, but it is for people who do not expect their family to guess at what their expectations are. Does that make sense?

Then with communication comes calm and organization in your home. It brings relief to chaos because you implemented a system and it also makes homeschooling a delight instead of drudgery.

Organization does not require some super human feat, but it requires the desire to change what is not working.

Get off the curriculum roller coaster because you will have many years to learn about curriculum.

Right behind taming the curriculum colossus, defending against the socialization hype and setting up a communication system are concerns over lesson planning, record keeping and testing.

4. Lesson Planning, Record Keeping and Testing.

Along with worries about curriculum comes the nagging worry deep down that our children will be behind or get behind if we don’t test or learn to lesson plan.

What I have learned along the way after teaching all of my sons how to read and write is that anytime I have felt that something is not working, I could change what I was using instantly.

Too, one-to-one tutoring is the best way of learning. This means that after a few years, I didn’t worry about testing my sons in the early years because I didn’t need a test telling me what they did or didn’t know.

Teaching them each day, I could tell you the strengths and weaknesses of each child.

Testing was a method introduced when you have to teach masses or a class, which generally is about 12 kids. Do you have 12 kids? If so, drop me a line, but otherwise for the rest of us, our  one-to-one time with our children gives a clear picture of their skills.

Oh sure, you can test anytime you want to and at the bottom I will add some of my posts about testing to help you.

As far as record keeping, from junior high to high school is when you need to be concerned about saving work. I have saved all of Mr. Senior 2013’s work but realized later I didn’t need near that much. New Homeschooler Mustering the Courage to Face the 4 Homeschool Biggies Part 2 @ Tina's Dynamic Homeschool PlusJournaling was so much better for me in the beginning as I learned to lesson plan.

Journaling what we had actually done for the day was a precursor to lesson planning. Why? Because it gave me a realistic picture of what we could actually do for the day instead of some glamorous looking lesson plans on paper that we couldn’t accomplish in two days let alone one day.

Stepping back from even just one of these homeschool biggies and focusing on each area in a balanced way will put you miles ahead of the homeschool learning curve.

Not only that but you will be able to savor your first couple of years instead of meeting each day with stress.

Which areas do you think will give you the greatest concern? I’m listening!

Hugs and love ya,

Tina Signature 2015c

Grab some more ammo to arm you for the new homeschool year. Check out these tips:
The Ultimate Guide for New Homeschoolers
What Do You Fear Most About Homeschooling?
Read my 31 Day Free Boot Camp for New Homeschoolers

2 CommentsFiled Under: Begin Homeschooling Tagged With: new homeschooler

New Homeschooler – Mustering the Courage to Face THE 4 Homeschool Biggies – Part 1.

July 19, 2015 | Leave a Comment
This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

Key to conquering all the topics you will be faced with in your first few years of homeschooling is identifying what they are.

Today, I want to infuse you by sharing some tips on facing THE 4 homeschool biggies.

When you are new to homeschooling, sometimes you just don’t know all the questions to ask and it can be hard to pinpoint exactly what is bothering you.

No need to stress about it because I will help you to round up what I call homeschool giants to slay.

When the homeschooling biggies are clearly identified, then your energy and time can be well-placed.

1. Curriculum Colossus.

As new homeschoolers, we are proud to show off to all naysayers or even to the Mr. that we have now made curriculum choices.

However, what can be daunting just a few short weeks into the year is that the curriculum choices we made may not be working.

Excitement turns to anxiety for both mother and child and curriculum seems like it becomes an almost insurmountable hurdle.

Facing the Homeschool Giants

Look at a few of my tips that can help you to analyze how to make choices for curriculum.

1. Did you pick the textbook approach just because that is the only one you know about and feel comfortable with?

I know it’s hard right now with so many things being thrown at you, but try to take time to educate yourself about learning styles.

Look at my post Homeschooling:Learning Styles – What’s the Difference Anyway to start down the road in pairing curriculum with your child’s learning style.

2. Also, don’t fall victim to public school mentality which is that just because your child is in a grade level that equates to the same grade level curriculum.

Guess what? You are not alone if you are already having curriculum problems if you chose your curriculum this way. New Homeschooler - Mustering the Courage to Face the 4 Homeschool Biggies Part 1 @ Tina's Dynamic Homeschool PlusThough the grade level your child is in when he attended public school can be a starting point, you will want to use free online tests, read the scope and sequence of a curriculum and look at free samples to make a more informed choice.

In addition, if your child has been in public school before then you probably have an idea of which subjects he struggles in.

For example, does it make sense to push him on to the next grade if he struggles and suffers terribly in math?

When a new homeschool teacher does this, it can have detrimental effects on a child.

Instead of getting the help he needs by you choosing a lower level to promote mastery, both your child and you may now blame the stress on homeschooling.

Don’t push through concepts in a curriculum that your child is not familiar with.

Learning overlaps and he wants to be somewhat familiar with some of the basic concepts so he can build on them this year whether the subject is math, writing or reading.

Encourage a love of your new homeschool routine and curriculum by allowing your child to feel like he has some mastery over what you are introducing.

When he connects with something he knows, he then knows he can go on and tackle the rest of it.

2. Socialization Hype.

I never get tired of touting about how well connected homeschoolers are. But year after year, we still have to defend against the same mind-set.

Somewhere, someplace, somebody is thinking that our children are poor lost souls, wandering aimlessly and without friends.

Never mind the fact that a doubter of homeschooling has not truly sat down with a well rounded out youth to only discover the idiosyncrasies he has, but that we all have.

Sure, if you look hard enough you can find the weird in me too.

So unless you plan to not ever be around other homeschoolers which I know is probably not the case, then your children will turn out “normal” like everybody else’s children.

New Homeschooler Empowered

Look at my post Socialization – A Homeschool Hallucination to grab some gracious ways to respond to those that think you are going to lock your kids up in a closet to only emerge at graduation.

Also, look at my post here Homeschool Hangouts & Socialization Situations on creative ways to find other homeschoolers in your area.

Believe me, homeschoolers are oozing everywhere and you can’t live in a city small enough that does not have homeschoolers. Okay, okay, you may have to drive a bit, but we are everywhere.

If you and your kids want friends, true, lifetime homeschooling friends, then a little bit of effort is needed.

And just a few more words of wisdom to help you muster up the courage to be around all those weird homeschoolers, look at my blog post Homeschool Field Trips – An Important Piece of the Educational Puzzle Part 1 and Homeschool Field Trips – An Important Piece of the Educational Puzzle Part 2.

Of course, you know my wordiness love for words, so I will share Part 2 of Mustering the Courage to Face THE 4 Homeschool Biggies next.

Can you guess what the other two biggies are?

Have you hit a wall yet with curriculum and socialization?

Hugs and love ya,

Tina Signature 2015c

Leave a CommentFiled Under: Begin Homeschooling Tagged With: new homeschooler, newbeehomeschooler

I Am Homeschooling Because I Want My Kids Socialized

June 17, 2015 | 13 Comments
This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see my full disclosure policy.

I am homeschooling because I want my kids socialized. That was the only answer I could think of to tell the lady in the checkout line at the store. Hopefully, that would nip in the bud any further questioning of the new lifestyle my husband and I had embraced.

I am Homeschooling Because I Want My Kids Socialized @ Tina's Dynamic Homeschool Plus

I got so tired of answering the same type of question: “Uhmm, are they going to be with other children their same age? “ Soon after that question would follow the dreaded S-word (socialization).

It was a classic moment to see the expression on their face change as they are not sure what to say next.

All of the so well-thought out reasons for homeschooling like building character, teaching from a Biblical view, and rigorous academics just didn’t come to mind right at that moment.

Are We Over Protecting Our Children When Homeschooling?

When you start to homeschool, it is a genuine concern of a lot of new homeschoolers to worry about socialization.

It is okay to fear that your children will not learn social graces.

As seasoned homeschoolers, we are quick to jumping and defending that issue, but what we don’t realize is that it is a valid concern of a lot of new homeschoolers.

Be sure to grab my book, Homeschooling 31 Day Boot Camp for New Homeschoolers: When You Don’t Know Where to Begin.

My answer above really was the truth when a lady asked me at the grocery store check out line.

I do homeschool because I want my sons socialized.

After researching and feeling better about it, my husband and I realized that somebody will influence our children.

Why shouldn’t it be people who care for and love them? Why should it be peers who may not influence them in the direction we want our sons to go?

It just made sense to me that learning should be natural out among people and not in a nook somewhere caged by four walls.

Peers vs. Parental Influence. Is It a Match?

Too, what is wrong with inflicting our will and our view on our children?

My mother who homeschooled my youngest sister in the 80’s says to this day that anybody can be a product of cultural warping.

Wow, what a true statement, I thought.

Too, it is kind of an oxymoron to me.

Part of the definition of socialization includes giving the individual skills and habits to participate in society. Who is going to teach that to my sons, another 6 year old?

Later, if a child doesn’t turn out to be a productive part of society, folks look back at their parents, not the peers. Who is looking insane then?

As a parent, I want my sons independent, self-learners and not dependent on peer pressure for acceptance.

Soon you learn too that with all the activities available to homeschoolers now, we get more socialization with a variety of other people, children and adults alike, than we ever would have had we been in public school. Why?

Because we ARE in the real world everyday mingling around in it and living life.

When you are asked why you are homeschooling, what is your answer?

You’ll love these other tips:

  • Socialization – A Homeschool Hallucination? 
  • How Do I Socialize My Homeschooled Kids? Are We Really Talking About this AGAIN?
  • Homeschool Co-op: The 5 BIG Questions You Need to Ask (before you join)

Hugs and love ya,

 

13 CommentsFiled Under: Begin Homeschooling

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